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Substance Abuse
17 yr old son doing drugs, hanging w members of a gang in NY
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<blockquote data-quote="defiantchild" data-source="post: 675555" data-attributes="member: 18543"><p>Svengandhi, thanks for sharing this info. My real concern is that I'm not sure any program we find for him will work.</p><p></p><p>My husband and I made a beautiful meal at home last night for the two boys and us. My Difficult Child is a year younger than my other son. We had a really nice time together. Difficult Child has been sick the past few days and has called into work. We are very worried he could lose his job. The reason I bring this us is because suddenly when dinner was over he said his friend is picking him up and they are going out. My husband told him he did not want him to go bc he's been sick and didn't even go to work that day. My Difficult Child basically laughed at him and said he's going out, he didn't really care what we thought. And he left, just like that. It illustrated more than ever how little control (none) we have over him. I think Copa is right when she talks about 'staying out of his way' allowing him to own his decisions entirely. It's so counter to what i've always thought 'good' parents should do. Protect and guide our children. We are unable to do either in the case of this son. We are still waiting to hear back from the lawyer about whether or not we can emancipate him if the court gives him a 'conditional discharge' or probation once he's sentenced on January 4th. </p><p></p><p>As for GED, he said he's not interested in doing that now. He wants to work for another year before getting it. Not sure why. Seems crazy to us. I can't figure him out at all. But we realize we can't push a string, we can't make him do anything. And the more we push, the less he's likely to do it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="defiantchild, post: 675555, member: 18543"] Svengandhi, thanks for sharing this info. My real concern is that I'm not sure any program we find for him will work. My husband and I made a beautiful meal at home last night for the two boys and us. My Difficult Child is a year younger than my other son. We had a really nice time together. Difficult Child has been sick the past few days and has called into work. We are very worried he could lose his job. The reason I bring this us is because suddenly when dinner was over he said his friend is picking him up and they are going out. My husband told him he did not want him to go bc he's been sick and didn't even go to work that day. My Difficult Child basically laughed at him and said he's going out, he didn't really care what we thought. And he left, just like that. It illustrated more than ever how little control (none) we have over him. I think Copa is right when she talks about 'staying out of his way' allowing him to own his decisions entirely. It's so counter to what i've always thought 'good' parents should do. Protect and guide our children. We are unable to do either in the case of this son. We are still waiting to hear back from the lawyer about whether or not we can emancipate him if the court gives him a 'conditional discharge' or probation once he's sentenced on January 4th. As for GED, he said he's not interested in doing that now. He wants to work for another year before getting it. Not sure why. Seems crazy to us. I can't figure him out at all. But we realize we can't push a string, we can't make him do anything. And the more we push, the less he's likely to do it. [/QUOTE]
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17 yr old son doing drugs, hanging w members of a gang in NY
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