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19 year old kicked out for the 4th time....
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<blockquote data-quote="last_straw_41" data-source="post: 452349" data-attributes="member: 12588"><p>Hi All, </p><p></p><p>New here and looking for some advice or support. My son used to me a very nice, funny, kind kid. Around the time he turned 15 or 16, it has been downhill from there. He is 19 years old now and I just had to kick him out of the house for the 4th time. He has only been back in the house for 1 week. I sat down with him this time and tried talking to him like a young adult. I explained the rules of my home and what I would and would not tolerate. </p><p></p><p>All of the times that he was kicked out was for the same reasons. He is disrespectful, hard to talk to even when I am trying extra hard to be nice, he has no concern for other people, he sneaks his friends in and out of my home when I don't know about it, items have been stolen and I have found beer and weed in his room. When I try to address his behavior, he gets very agitated and starts yelling and telling me to shut up and quit talking to him. </p><p></p><p>I have told him that he may not have people in my home. Within one week, he had someone sleeping over that I walked in on. Although he knows the rules, he has broken then within one week. Today when I addressed it...the same irrational behavior. This time he cursed at me and called me names. Told me I was a home wrecker (His dad and I are divorced) and much more. </p><p></p><p>I do not want to deal with him. When he is in my home, I am tense and very stressed. I don't want to leave the house long for fear he is allowing his friends to come in and ransack the place. He can not live with me in his current state. I have tried to suggest he get help but that is impossible. I had to call the police on him last time because when he was confronted about sneaking people in my home at 2:30 a.m. ( I caught him), he punched holes in my walls and tore down a door. </p><p></p><p>I feel like I have a right to be happy. I work very hard and when I come home, I want to have a peaceful environment. Idon't feel like I should be obligated to allow my son to speak to me any kind of way he wants to. As he left this time, he threatened to break all my windows out. This is not the kid I raised and I feel like I have done something or not done something to produce this kind of child. I don't know how to help him at this point. When he is not at home, I feel so releived that I don't have to bite my tongue or be forced to address this horrible choices. He has no respect for anyone. </p><p></p><p>I don't know if I am asking anything. Just wanted to understand what is wrong with im and if anyone else has experienced this type of behaviour. How did you cope with it? What he heck do I do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="last_straw_41, post: 452349, member: 12588"] Hi All, New here and looking for some advice or support. My son used to me a very nice, funny, kind kid. Around the time he turned 15 or 16, it has been downhill from there. He is 19 years old now and I just had to kick him out of the house for the 4th time. He has only been back in the house for 1 week. I sat down with him this time and tried talking to him like a young adult. I explained the rules of my home and what I would and would not tolerate. All of the times that he was kicked out was for the same reasons. He is disrespectful, hard to talk to even when I am trying extra hard to be nice, he has no concern for other people, he sneaks his friends in and out of my home when I don't know about it, items have been stolen and I have found beer and weed in his room. When I try to address his behavior, he gets very agitated and starts yelling and telling me to shut up and quit talking to him. I have told him that he may not have people in my home. Within one week, he had someone sleeping over that I walked in on. Although he knows the rules, he has broken then within one week. Today when I addressed it...the same irrational behavior. This time he cursed at me and called me names. Told me I was a home wrecker (His dad and I are divorced) and much more. I do not want to deal with him. When he is in my home, I am tense and very stressed. I don't want to leave the house long for fear he is allowing his friends to come in and ransack the place. He can not live with me in his current state. I have tried to suggest he get help but that is impossible. I had to call the police on him last time because when he was confronted about sneaking people in my home at 2:30 a.m. ( I caught him), he punched holes in my walls and tore down a door. I feel like I have a right to be happy. I work very hard and when I come home, I want to have a peaceful environment. Idon't feel like I should be obligated to allow my son to speak to me any kind of way he wants to. As he left this time, he threatened to break all my windows out. This is not the kid I raised and I feel like I have done something or not done something to produce this kind of child. I don't know how to help him at this point. When he is not at home, I feel so releived that I don't have to bite my tongue or be forced to address this horrible choices. He has no respect for anyone. I don't know if I am asking anything. Just wanted to understand what is wrong with im and if anyone else has experienced this type of behaviour. How did you cope with it? What he heck do I do. [/QUOTE]
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