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Parent Emeritus
20yo difficult child determined to get married - soon
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 499549" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>He is an adult and trying to make this choice for him will only drive him away. Premarital counseling is excellent and I would strongly encourage it though. Trying to do it yourself, or to influence his decision one way or the other will only make sure that he pulls away from you, possibly very hard. If you encourage it and it doesn't work out, then it is all your fault because you sabotaged him or you should have stopped him (as if you could). If you don't encourage it and it does work out, then you tried to ruin it and drive her away and all you ever wanted was for him to be miserable and unhappy. </p><p></p><p>I had to laugh about the "good catch" comments. When one cousin got married his mom and her mom stood together drinking and going on and on about what a good catch their child was for the other one. A few days later they both laughed to realize that while they agreed with each other, neither one realized that at the time of the conversation, the bride's mom was saying that the groom got a "good catch" and the groom's mom was saying the bride did!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 499549, member: 1233"] He is an adult and trying to make this choice for him will only drive him away. Premarital counseling is excellent and I would strongly encourage it though. Trying to do it yourself, or to influence his decision one way or the other will only make sure that he pulls away from you, possibly very hard. If you encourage it and it doesn't work out, then it is all your fault because you sabotaged him or you should have stopped him (as if you could). If you don't encourage it and it does work out, then you tried to ruin it and drive her away and all you ever wanted was for him to be miserable and unhappy. I had to laugh about the "good catch" comments. When one cousin got married his mom and her mom stood together drinking and going on and on about what a good catch their child was for the other one. A few days later they both laughed to realize that while they agreed with each other, neither one realized that at the time of the conversation, the bride's mom was saying that the groom got a "good catch" and the groom's mom was saying the bride did! [/QUOTE]
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20yo difficult child determined to get married - soon
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