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General Parenting
26 yrs old son.anxiety/worried/many cluster B/ short version.
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<blockquote data-quote="ANewLife4Me" data-source="post: 764577" data-attributes="member: 32799"><p>My daughter is 31 and has multiple mental disorders including schizophrenia. She refuses therapy or medication unless court ordered. 10 years of back and forth with her being in and out of jail, helping her restart her life all over again, to only have her back in jail this very minute. <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="😭" title="Loudly crying face :sob:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/1f62d.png" data-shortname=":sob:" /> All the wasted years of my husband and my life, I tell you from experience after 10 years we are cutting her loose on her own. The guilt and pain we feel is horrendous but, it must be done. After she is freed from jail she will literally be on the streets. She was living out of her car but has since lost her insurance for non payment and most likely the car will be repossessed before she gets out.</p><p></p><p>We all come to a point that we made excuses for their behavior, a big one for me was her mental. But as you see with your own son, they are very capable and can hold down jobs ect….they just don’t want too. I have found that I am an enabler and a co-dependent to my children. It’s a vicious cycle because we love them so much but really, we are limiting their potential to figure things out for themselves.</p><p></p><p>You have to think more of yourself, hard as it is even with my daughter….my mental and physical well being are at stake if I continued as I was. My personal opinion is you already know what needs to be done by giving him 30 days, no apartment and no car. It’s so hard, I am going through it myself but, what’s the harm to back off and see what he will do on his own? He might surprise you. <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="😊" title="Smiling face with smiling eyes :blush:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/1f60a.png" data-shortname=":blush:" /> Don’t become upset with words like, I will kill myself if I am homeless. My daughter has blamed me for her even being born and knows what to say and manipulated me. I am tired after doing this so long, it’s time for ME. I pray you come to the same decision and stand firm.</p><p></p><p>The 2 books in my about section helped me greatly to see what’s going on, they empowered me to keep strong. It’s a daily struggle we are all battling right now. For me personally enough was enough, I even had to change my phone number. She can be violent and if it becomes an issue we will move as well. Sounds harsh right? It’s until they decide what to do with their life, not you, protect at all costs your well being. <img class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" alt="❤️" title="Red heart :heart:" src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/6.6/png/unicode/64/2764.png" data-shortname=":heart:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ANewLife4Me, post: 764577, member: 32799"] My daughter is 31 and has multiple mental disorders including schizophrenia. She refuses therapy or medication unless court ordered. 10 years of back and forth with her being in and out of jail, helping her restart her life all over again, to only have her back in jail this very minute. 😭 All the wasted years of my husband and my life, I tell you from experience after 10 years we are cutting her loose on her own. The guilt and pain we feel is horrendous but, it must be done. After she is freed from jail she will literally be on the streets. She was living out of her car but has since lost her insurance for non payment and most likely the car will be repossessed before she gets out. We all come to a point that we made excuses for their behavior, a big one for me was her mental. But as you see with your own son, they are very capable and can hold down jobs ect….they just don’t want too. I have found that I am an enabler and a co-dependent to my children. It’s a vicious cycle because we love them so much but really, we are limiting their potential to figure things out for themselves. You have to think more of yourself, hard as it is even with my daughter….my mental and physical well being are at stake if I continued as I was. My personal opinion is you already know what needs to be done by giving him 30 days, no apartment and no car. It’s so hard, I am going through it myself but, what’s the harm to back off and see what he will do on his own? He might surprise you. 😊 Don’t become upset with words like, I will kill myself if I am homeless. My daughter has blamed me for her even being born and knows what to say and manipulated me. I am tired after doing this so long, it’s time for ME. I pray you come to the same decision and stand firm. The 2 books in my about section helped me greatly to see what’s going on, they empowered me to keep strong. It’s a daily struggle we are all battling right now. For me personally enough was enough, I even had to change my phone number. She can be violent and if it becomes an issue we will move as well. Sounds harsh right? It’s until they decide what to do with their life, not you, protect at all costs your well being. ❤️ [/QUOTE]
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26 yrs old son.anxiety/worried/many cluster B/ short version.
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