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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 547110" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>If he is an Aspie (which is a form of high functioning autism) he will NOT end up in juvie. Unless an Aspie has another diagnosis too, Aspies tend to be extreme rule followers when they get older. But they need help (even if he doesn't have it, he needs help). The benefit of having a diagnosis is that he will need services either from school (even though he is being homeschooled) or in the community. The Aspie behavior won't go away by itself and it has nothing to do with your being a "bad" parent. I would stop sharing so much with Mom if she's going to make you feel bad and cry. </p><p></p><p>My son has high functioning autism. Some call it Aspergers. He is now nineteen. He was a lot like your son when he was little, only I was an older parent and I knew 1/not to share everything with others and 2/that it was not my fault when he acted "different." My son also engaged other children, but he really didn't know how to play with them and often just wanted to be by himself rather than play. Actually, the most important thing is to get him into interventions regardless of what a professional tells you he has right now. Diagnoses tend to change as our kids get older and things become clearer.</p><p></p><p>Most of all, I just want to tell you that this is NOT your fault. You have a differently wired child who is not a "typical" child and that's why you have a problem with him. Often our kids behave well for people they don't see as often as us. Then they let it all hang out at home because it is hard for them to control themselves. They do it away from home, then they are so wound up from holding it in that they let it all out on those they are sure love them the most. It's actually a compliment.</p><p></p><p>If he is on the spectrum, he probably doesn't understand or care that he is being disrespectful. This is hard, but it comes with time. My son is probably the sweetest young adult you will ever meet. He is never disrespectful anymore, yet at your son's age he was a hyperactive handful and a half.</p><p></p><p>Nobody helped a child, however, by buring her head and hoping "it" went away (whatever "it" is). He is your child. You know something isn't quite right. You in my opinion need to pursue it and help him so he can be the best he can be. (((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 547110, member: 1550"] If he is an Aspie (which is a form of high functioning autism) he will NOT end up in juvie. Unless an Aspie has another diagnosis too, Aspies tend to be extreme rule followers when they get older. But they need help (even if he doesn't have it, he needs help). The benefit of having a diagnosis is that he will need services either from school (even though he is being homeschooled) or in the community. The Aspie behavior won't go away by itself and it has nothing to do with your being a "bad" parent. I would stop sharing so much with Mom if she's going to make you feel bad and cry. My son has high functioning autism. Some call it Aspergers. He is now nineteen. He was a lot like your son when he was little, only I was an older parent and I knew 1/not to share everything with others and 2/that it was not my fault when he acted "different." My son also engaged other children, but he really didn't know how to play with them and often just wanted to be by himself rather than play. Actually, the most important thing is to get him into interventions regardless of what a professional tells you he has right now. Diagnoses tend to change as our kids get older and things become clearer. Most of all, I just want to tell you that this is NOT your fault. You have a differently wired child who is not a "typical" child and that's why you have a problem with him. Often our kids behave well for people they don't see as often as us. Then they let it all hang out at home because it is hard for them to control themselves. They do it away from home, then they are so wound up from holding it in that they let it all out on those they are sure love them the most. It's actually a compliment. If he is on the spectrum, he probably doesn't understand or care that he is being disrespectful. This is hard, but it comes with time. My son is probably the sweetest young adult you will ever meet. He is never disrespectful anymore, yet at your son's age he was a hyperactive handful and a half. Nobody helped a child, however, by buring her head and hoping "it" went away (whatever "it" is). He is your child. You know something isn't quite right. You in my opinion need to pursue it and help him so he can be the best he can be. (((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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