I usually take my son grocery shopping with me and I generally let him pick out what we will buy.... So we were in the produce department and I said "Let's get some cucumbers." DS grabbed one. It was a little mis-shapen. It had a long thin shaft and a bulge at the tip--definitely phallic-looking and a little too "happy to see me" if you know what I mean. "O no," I said. "Not that one. Let's get a different one." DS pointed it at me and said "But why? It's the biggest one here." "Honey," I said. "Size doesn't matter." DS looked down at the cucumber gripped firmly in his hand and declared "Yes, it does!!!".