A little of this, a little of that.....

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by timer lady, Apr 5, 2010.

  1. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    After all of kt's "nonsense" & wm's "goofiness" I put my foot down. I spoke with each of them separately & told them I had taken enough from their "antics" for lack of a better term. kt with her sexual partners in the house; wm with his propensity for stealing. I let them know I expected them to straighten up & do the right thing. To stop & think of before they talked or walked.

    Saying that, kt knows she can refuse treatment. wm knows it as well. The law is beyond reason as our my children.

    Two weeks ago I had had enough not being able to leave kt here with someone so I could go see wm. In fact, I believe that kt gets all wound up anytime there is a hint of me visiting wm. Soooooo......I took kt & Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker with me. Let kt know she could sit in the car or she could address the elephant in the room & see her twin as a person, not a huge fear. (I let wm know the same thing earlier that week however didn't tell him I was coming with kt).

    I cleared the visit with foster mum; brought an Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) worker along. It was wonderful to see my children together again. They talked music, movies, played basketball & we all went down to the park. All in all we all spent 2 hours together.

    The aftermath for the tweedles has been good. Good reports all around.

    For me, not so much. Some of those on wm's team are suggesting child endangerment.

    I believe that wm's team especially keep forgetting I am the parent & legal guardian. I see no one taking full custody or making my children wards of the state. Nor do I see the team following the entire treatment plan which is to include supervised visits between kt & wm.

    It was a wonderful time together with my children. It really was...both wonder when they can see each other again. Mental health CM is delighted (I also informed him ahead of time) & disappointed in both team's refusal to support this...i.e. any employee who is there when the tweedles see one another will be pulled from the case.

    A meeting of both teams is being called - the plan filed with the county is to be followed; the teams will offer support. The plan is before the county as it is & the judge refuses to change the goal of family reunification with supervised visits between my twins.

    Whether I'm charged with child endangerment remains to be seen .... I had a happy day - a few hours together as a whole family.
  2. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I understand laws and decisions were made with the best of intentions...but the world is not always black and white.

    You have to continue to live a life and its not under the best of circumstances. You do all you can do... And I beleive you're doing it the best you possibly can.

    Recently, it was suggested that someone was thinking of accusing me of the same; a someone who has much less vested interest than, I'd assume, even those on wm's team do...I laughed. Let them try.

  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I'm so happy to hear this! I had feared things were going frrom bad to worse for you but this sounds great! You know, sometimes we just have to let all the stuff come out and get past the fear or worry of telling others what we think our kids need. I had been very worried about somewhat exploding to my son's PO but since I let it all out to him, we've gotten along fine. I guess some of it has to do with making sure you are dealing with a rational, reasonable person though.

    Anyway, this sounds like a very healthy visit for all involved to me- and a much needed one. I don't get at all why anyone is trying to turn it into a possible child endangerment issue. There were two adults with both kids at all times and neither adult has committed a crime against a child so I can't see that there would be a leg to stand on. And it's not like kt was traumatized by seeing wm this visit so it didn't harm her emotionally.
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so glad that you and the tweedles had a pleasant afternoon!
  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I think that it is wonderful! You spoke to the children as though they were "normal" kids pulling that garbage. You had a really great time with both kids, and they with each other. You had all the approvals you needed. YOU are the PARENT.

    I really think all these grumblings about charging you with endangerment or taking the kids away are simply workers who got too much taste for their own power and saw it threatened by you making normal parenting decisions.

    The wrangling seems to come up after every time you don't get every single one of their opinions. ALL they have are opinions. Not a leg to stand on, in my opinion.

    Way To Go!!
  6. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Since you and I talked about this, you know how I feel and you know I support your decision 100%!!