Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
A strange balance point
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 621125" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>RE, you have done something really different here. What maturity and grace and wisdom and WORK it takes to be silent. As a big talker and a big words person (as you know, lol), over the past few years I am gaining such an appreciation for silence. You were simply bearing witness. Loving witness. You showed up. You were present. RE, this is really big. I see it as a huge step forward for you and by bearing witness, perhaps for me, too. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Well you either will or you won't, RE. And whatever you DECIDE to do, and yes now, you are deciding, not reacting in the pain, heat and crisis of the moment, whatever you decide to do, RE, that will be your decision at that time. And even if you look back at it later, and decide you could have make a different choice, that will be okay too. </p><p></p><p>I used to think, oh, I obsessed about this, what if I do or say this one thing that makes something bad really happened? And then someone said: Wow you must be the most powerful person in the world if you can make something happen---or not---by just saying one thing or doing one thing? Said tongue in cheek, with a small smile, but I got it. I still get it. </p><p></p><p>Whatever you do, each little and big decision RE, you are okay. All will be okay. </p><p></p><p>Getting the car---it passes the smell "test"---Am I about to do something for her she could do for herself? Well, she couldn't do this thing. And so you did it. You would do it for anyone, RE. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>This made me cry, RE, it is so beautiful and so tender and...THIS is love. Standing beside you in your silence and your pain and your love. And your detachment. Hey RE, SO can come on the cruise, too! He's in! (smile)</p><p></p><p>I am so thankful for your example today. You were different, RE, and so your daughter, and your relationship with her, will be different. maybe, just maybe, in your silence there is space. There is space for her to hear something new, to see her own power over her own life, and for her to find a new place to stand.</p><p></p><p>You are giving her a new chance, RE.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 621125, member: 17542"] RE, you have done something really different here. What maturity and grace and wisdom and WORK it takes to be silent. As a big talker and a big words person (as you know, lol), over the past few years I am gaining such an appreciation for silence. You were simply bearing witness. Loving witness. You showed up. You were present. RE, this is really big. I see it as a huge step forward for you and by bearing witness, perhaps for me, too. Well you either will or you won't, RE. And whatever you DECIDE to do, and yes now, you are deciding, not reacting in the pain, heat and crisis of the moment, whatever you decide to do, RE, that will be your decision at that time. And even if you look back at it later, and decide you could have make a different choice, that will be okay too. I used to think, oh, I obsessed about this, what if I do or say this one thing that makes something bad really happened? And then someone said: Wow you must be the most powerful person in the world if you can make something happen---or not---by just saying one thing or doing one thing? Said tongue in cheek, with a small smile, but I got it. I still get it. Whatever you do, each little and big decision RE, you are okay. All will be okay. Getting the car---it passes the smell "test"---Am I about to do something for her she could do for herself? Well, she couldn't do this thing. And so you did it. You would do it for anyone, RE. This made me cry, RE, it is so beautiful and so tender and...THIS is love. Standing beside you in your silence and your pain and your love. And your detachment. Hey RE, SO can come on the cruise, too! He's in! (smile) I am so thankful for your example today. You were different, RE, and so your daughter, and your relationship with her, will be different. maybe, just maybe, in your silence there is space. There is space for her to hear something new, to see her own power over her own life, and for her to find a new place to stand. You are giving her a new chance, RE. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
A strange balance point
Top