A Thought On Laughter & Tears

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by HeadlightsMom, Jun 12, 2015.

  1. HeadlightsMom

    HeadlightsMom Well-Known Member

    I was very recently asked how I find laughter so often. Trust me, I have my share of tears (I cry often, actually.....in beauty and in tragedy). Tears are aplenty. I have lived many days without laughter. At times, that's necessary (esp in grieving process). But laughter is also there when I choose it. Hardship happens. So does joy. Laughter helps me shift my focus from the ugly to the beautiful.

    My answer to their question? Pretty simple.....

    Having lived WITH and WITHOUT laughter, I prefer laughter (generally).

    I need to laugh AND cry -- not just one or the other. May not be that way for everyone, but it is for me.

    Everyone -- Please know that my laughter is, in no way, meant to ever trivialize anyone else's pain. Rest assured that being a part of this group, I am well acquainted with pain. I feel your hearts -- through the laughter and the tears.
     
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    I "hear" you.

    I'm hard of hearing. It means I miss hearing stuff, and more often mis-hear stuff. We've decided as a family that we can either get mad about the stupid stuff my brain thinks it heard, or we can laugh at it. So... most of the time, we just laugh. And some of them have been side-splittingly funny.
     
  3. HeadlightsMom

    HeadlightsMom Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I "hear" you, too. :) My post hits 2 fronts:

    1) How we respond in our family (just as you so eloquently put it!)

    2) How I respond in this site/group (I recall how hard those days were when I just couldn't find a laugh anywhere.....and I wish to be sensitive to others who may be in that same place right now).

    I love a good belly-laugh! I just always wish to be sensitive, too. It's an interesting balance some days. :)
     
  4. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    We can't choose our fate, we can choose how we deal with it.

    For me laughter, often times, is the preferred method. It is a choice in how I want to see life. Even if, at times and to some, it may seem juvenile or even flippant.

    In this forum I often try to avoid that attitude because due language and cultural barrier the danger of being understood wrong is obvious and I of course do not want to offend. But I do forget at times.
     
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2015
  5. HeadlightsMom

    HeadlightsMom Well-Known Member

    SuZir -- Yep, we surely do have a choice in our focus. Not always easy, but possible. Like you, humor is very helpful to me, too. I don't mind if I'm viewed as juvenile (oh.....if you only knew! LOL!).

    But I do try to take care with my words if they may hurt someone else. Not always good with that (and I try to take responsibility when I'm not). But I do know how it feels to feel raw and tender -- particularly with regard to parenting and family matters. I appreciate it greatly when others are sensitive to my feelings at those times. And so, likewise, I try to give that same sensitivity to others during their sensitive times. It can make a world of difference -- sometimes in both their world and mine.

    Pain, confusion and exhaustion are the common denominators which brought us all to this forum. Guessing we all respond to these things in our own way.

    And that diversity is what makes this forum so helpful!
     
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