A Vent About MEN!!!! (Feel free to add one of your own)

[DaisyFace]

Hello everyone--

So we all know that men don't listen, right? Or they do that "Uh-huh, Uh-huh, Uh-huh...." and then have NO idea what you said...

So here's where we are:

We own a washing machine with all the bells and whistles....(it's got a lot more features than I needed, but guess who picked out the machine? That's right, husband). The best feature is the energy-saver and automatic water-saving sensors....it checks the weight of the load and only uses the minimum water needed for load size. Works great for regular loads of clothes or towels--but if you wash something big and light (like sheets), you have to over-ride the sensors and manually select the water level.

This machine is wonderful as far as energy conservation goes and I try to use outdoor clotheslines whenever possible to avoid using the electric dryer. Even so, we have had some pretty high electric bills lately...

A few weeks ago, DS broke the clothesline while playing in the yard. I asked husband if he had any rope to put up a new one. Repsonse? "Uh-huh, Uh-huh, Uh-huh.....".

So, no clothesline.

This weekend, husband says he wants our comforter washed. I ask him again if he can please put up the clothesline. "Uh-huh, Uh-huh, Uh-huh...."

So still no clothesline.

Monday night, husband decided he couldn't wait another day for the comforter (I guess 24 hours was just too much) so he packed it into the washer at night--set the overnight timer (so the electronic panel was on all night long), and before he left for work the next morning he jammed the comforter into the dryer and set it on high heat for an hour and a half (yeah THAT won't run the electricity). AND because he doesn't know how to use the machine (even though he's the one that wanted all those fancy features) he never manually set the water level, so the machine only used a trickle of water, PLUS he used way too much detergent AND he added bleach without using the bleach setting.

So needless to say I was aggravated that the comforter will have to be re-washed. AND I discovered that the inside of the washer was covered with blue streaks.

When husband came home from work I took him into the laundry room--showed him the streaks, talked about now having to run the machine's cleaning cycle, talked about the different settings, showed him the comforter that now needed a re-wash and asked him to PLEASE to just let me do the laundry....and while I'm thinking of it, could he please put up a clothesline.

"Uh-huh, Uh-huh, Uh-huh...."

So this morning, I discover that he DID IT AGAIN!! He must have put the sheets in the washer while I was getting ready for bed--did NOT run the cleaning cycle, so the sheets went in with whatever the blue stuff was, once again let the timer run all night, once again did NOT set the water level, once again used too much detergent and YES, ONCE AGAIN used bleach without the bleach setting and then put the sheets in the dryer for an HOUR.

AAARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!

If he would open his ears and actually LISTEN I would have washed his stinkin comforter and hung it on the clothesline and everythig would have been fine....but NO we need to cover eveything with bleach and then wash it with NO WATER and dry the *&%^ out of it with the electric dryer.



I give up....but on the upside, it looks like a have lots of blotchy white sheets to raise in surrender.

--DaisyF

 

[mstang67chic]

O
M
G

All I'm letting myself say here is that I feel for you and understand TOTALLY. Anything more.....could be ugly.

 

[hearts and roses]

What a knucklehead!

I am in Florida on business till Friday (arrived yesterday) and H is just groaning that I am not there - the household equilibrium is off now because the glue (me) is not there to hold it all together.

I know that when I arrive home on Friday I will have a lot of 'tidying' up to do because, apparently, no one knows how to wipe down a counter.

Thanks for the opportunity to vent a little too!

 

[AnnieO]

OMG that sounds so familiar!!!

Except in my case, husband knows how to wash laundry and dishes. It's Jett!

He insisted on making coffee for us a few days ago. Saturday night, so it would be ready Sunday. I've shown him how. So I reminded him... "four scoops" and left the room. And told him NOT to set the timer, because we get up later on the weekends.

So I get up Sunday morning... Stagger into the kitchen, sans glasses... And slip and fall on the coffee puddle on the floor!

I was sleepy enough that I was still relaxed, so no bruises, and no one saw me. So I stand up, wring out my shorts, and look at the coffeepot. It's off, of course. The coffee is made, but cold - not even lukewarm as it should be. Of course, it's also ALL OVER THE COUNTER!

We have one of those coffeepots that has a bucket instead of a carafe, so you can get one cup at a time. Everything was there. The bucket was only about half full. Coffee grounds everywhere.

The little hole the coffee goes through to the bucket was plugged up with grounds. Because... Jett forgot the filter. And apparently started it Saturday night!

I just laughed, strained some coffee and heated it in the microwave, and rinsed the thing out. Started a new pot. Mopped the puddle, went outside with the dog and just sat there giggling for about 20 minutes.

At least it was better and easier to clean than the frozen cheese sandwich in the microwave for six minutes.

 

[DammitJanet]

Ok...let me say I feel your pain!

And I will add to the vent.

Tony has been working out of town since mid Feb. He is gone all week and comes home on the weekends. I used to hate this type of thing when the boys were growing up but now I LOVE it...lol. Actually I hated it up till Cory moved out because it never failed that Cory got more mouthy with me when Tony was gone but now he isnt here to be a pain and now he takes on more of a watchful eye over me...lol.

Well...ever since we got back from Ohio Tony has been working "in town" as we call it when he comes home every night. This just means he works within a two hour radius of our home. Well he had been saying for all these past 6 months or so how wonderful it was that I hadnt had any meltdowns and how it must be that I was getting better! Hmmm. I now know why I havent had meltdowns...he hasnt been home! I have been able to do what I wanted to do all week. No nagging about dinner being ready at a certain time all week. No asking what I do all day. Ugh.

Im ready to throttle the man. I keep asking him when he is leaving again and making comments about how I am calling his boss to tell him he better get him back on the road again! Too much togetherness is just wrong!

 

[trinityroyal]

DaisyFace, honest to goodness! In your shoes, I would have used those mottled white sheets to hog-tie husband and leave him UNDER the broken clothesline.

I don't have a heckuva lot to complain about on the husband front lately. He's being an absolute angel. I think the Scary Hormonal Pregnant Lady episodes have scared him to death, and he's afraid to step even one inch out of line.

Trinity

 

[Shari]

Huh.

I didn't think polygamy was legal.

Seems a lot of us are married to the same man.

 

[KTMom91]

My turn...

I had knee surgery last Monday, and though I'm healing up better this time than the last, I'm still not 100%. Miss KT is good about doing laundry, and hanging it on the line, BUT she hates to bring it in. Hubby won't, because she hung it out there, so she can get it. And besides, he's been taking care of the kitchen for me.

Let's discuss the kitchen. Hubby did dishes over the weekend...they are still in the drainer. Every pan that was used since Friday is on the stove, waiting. A stack of plates etc are sitting on the counter; guess they're supposed to hop into the dishwasher by themselves.

And back to the laundry. When I can convince someone to bring in the clothes, they don't get folded and put away. Nope. There is an entire mountain range of clothing in my bedroom. At this point, I don't know what's clean, what's dirty, what doesn't fit anymore...you know the routine. And since I'm feeling SO MUCH BETTER, maybe I can put all the clothes away today (since I don't do anything anyway)...but only if you feel up to it, dear.

I think I'll take another nap.

 

[totoro]

I feel for you ladies! I don't know how you don't string them up!!!

Your posts make me feel really lucky.

husband knows to stay away from the laundry unless I am out of town, which is very rare.

 

[AnnieO]

I feel like you're right, Shari, we ARE all married to the same guy.

A while back I got fed up with the laundry situation myself. I tacked up 5 signs on the laundry room wall, one for each basket: Jeans, Dark Colors, Light Colors, Whites, Towels & Sheets.

On Friday evening/Saturday morning, everyone takes their own laundry downstairs and sorts it themselves. I do the actual laundry. If it's not there, it doesn't get washed. Each person is allowed one load per week if they miss the cutoff - and they have to wash and dry it themselves.

Once the laundry is washed and dried, I cart it upstairs. I sort it into piles - husband, Onyxx, Jett. I fold mine and put it away, and take the baskets back downstairs. Each person is responsible for retrieval, folding and putting away of their own stuff.

Onyxx usually ends up making 3-4 trips because she gets her laundry after each load. I know she doesn't fold it, but that's her issue - if she likes wrinkles, so be it.

Jett and husband I will tell once, when everything's done. I will let it go for 2 days. Then I start getting naggish.

I think I'm going to start mysteriously making the piles vanish and then they can wait a week and do 2x the folding and putting away. Or more. All I have to do is find a place to hide the wrinkly clothes...

 

[Star*]

Daisy -

We ARE twins - we are living with TWINS......we have the same washing machine - and the same NO CLOTHESLINE PUTTING UP MATES....

SAME EXACT SCENARIO happened to me - with one slight difference.....

When I didn't get MY clothesline - I went to the Dollar General - bought 2 100 ' cloth clotheslines - strung them from tree to shinging tree all over the yard - (it looked SO hillbilly) and hung out EVERY blanket I could wash and find in my house. When DF came home it looked like an ad for Tide washing detergent. He got out the poles - he got out the welder and to this DAY - I SWEAR TO HEAVEN ABOVE - he dropped that post on his foot on purpose and three years later? I still don't have a clothes line.

His excuse now? Well we ARE going to move - you don't want to give the next woman YOUR clothes line do you? ARGGGGGGGGGGH.

 

[mstang67chic]

I think I'm going to start mysteriously making the piles vanish and then they can wait a week and do 2x the folding and putting away. Or more. All I have to do is find a place to hide the wrinkly clothes...

Your house goes on FOREVER. You shouldn't have any problem finding a place to stash stuff! LOL

 

[Star*]

Steph -

Put the wrinkley clothes in the car - and as you drive down a crowded city road with homeless people toss the clothes out the window - you are recycling and eliminating at the same time and if I'm not mistaken - it COULD be considered delegating! (I know it's a stretch) but think of it as clothing the homeless and a tax writeoff.

 

[Shari]

When I didn't get MY clothesline - I went to the Dollar General - bought 2 100 ' cloth clotheslines - strung them from tree to shinging tree all over the yard - (it looked SO hillbilly) and hung out EVERY blanket I could wash and find in my house. When DF came home it looked like an ad for Tide washing detergent.

So are you still using that 200' clothesline???

 

[Andy]

As I have said before, our difficult child boys will grow up to be men so, sometimes when they simply can not get it, it is not always because they are difficult children, it can just be because they are male! Knowledge does not always help when the wisdom isn't there to guide it.

My husband - he does his own laundry. Our area of frustration is food. He grew up with a mother who lived through the depression and was a horrid cook so he does not know better. His latest? He made sloppy joes the other day and insisted that as long as we had bread and hotdog (yes hotdog) buns we were set. Umm, no! I eat my sloppy joes on a hamburger bun - so I gave $$$ to difficult child to ride bike to a nearby convenience store to get the buns that I needed. husband was not happy that I spent $$ on hamburger buns that day when there was already other bread in the house! Give me a break!

My husband - will eat burnt popcorn just so it "doesn't go to waste!" His mother controlled him with food and brainwashed him so bad that I have to throw away old food when he is not looking or he will insist that it is wasteful to throw it and it must be eaten. I am certainly not going to eat leftovers and am very picky about which leftovers I let my kids eat. He is bound to die of food poisoning from old moldy food one of these days.

 

[muttmeister]

Your post has just reminded me why I love living alone so much. Yes, I have to do all of the laundry; yes, if the clothes line breaks I have to fix it myself. BUT at least it gets fixed.

Sometimes I think that, IN THEORY, having a husband wouldn't be so bad. But then I remember that IN PRACTICE, it is much different. I eat what I want to eat when I want to eat it. I watch what I want to watch on TV without having to fight somebody for the remote. I spend my money on what I want to spend it on and don't have to hear somebody questioning me about it. Nobody complains if I have 60 pairs of shoes. Nobody complains if I choose to stay up till 3 reading a book and then sleep in the next day. Nobody complains when I paint my dining room purple or paint stripes on my walls or paint my front door a flaming orange. Nobody second guessed me when I tore out the vegetable garden and planted it all in herbs and flowers. And the only farts I have to smell are the dogs'.

 

[DDD]

I am going to discreetly pass on this thread because.........if I got started tonight I would still be typing tomorrow!! It's absolutely insane! DDD

 

[Marguerite]

DaisyFace, I'm lucky in that my husband is a gem who was raised to know how to fend for himself. His mother housetrained him for me. He still sorts the washing into coloureds and whites even though we now cold-wash and all our stuff is colour-fast!

However, accidents do happen now and then.

WHat I would do in your shoes - there's nothing like the present. It would be ABSOLUTELY NO SERVICE until that clothesline was up. He gets home form work and wants his cup of tea and finner - sorry mate, I NEED that washing line in place before you get anyrhing. DO IT NOW. It's dark? Well it wasn't when I asked you the first five times...

As for the sheets and the comforter - by now they must be in fairly awful state. They've been wet, singed, stained and sodden. I'd put them on the bed as they are (still damp if necessary) and if the clothesline isn't up, guess what he has to sleep under?

There's nothing like the smell of singe and mildew to get your point across.

My mother raised me well - my father could be passive-aggressive at times. She learned to fight fire with a fire extinguisher. I watched.

But I agree - a lot of men do seem to be domestically challenged. WHen I was at uni and living in residential college, we had communal laundry facilities with washing machines and dryers bought from funds raised by the students. In other words - WE had to look after them and some kids were not pulling their weight. The machines kept having to be repaired and the student council were seriously considering pulling it all out and making us use the town laundromat. I mostly took my laundry home on weekends so it didn't matter to me.

But one afternoon I was walking past the laundry room and I heard the sounds of machines choking. There was smoke/steam (not sure which, I went to investigate) and it turned out to be a load of dripping wet bloke's jeans CRAMMED into the dryer. And I mean crammed. and DRIPPING wet. When I investigated, it looked like the washing machine had been shut off before the spin dry (possibly it was out of balance and the bloke responsible didn't know to turn it off, rearrange the jeans so they are not all on one side of the machine, then start it again. When we later questioned him it turned out to be exactly the case.
But the dryer - it was a tumble dryer but so overloaded that it could't even turn! The motor had been about to seize, things were so bad.

He was lucky I saved his washing and the machines, or he would have been hit with the bill.

I did find in general - it was mostly the rich kids who were the worst culprits. And ALWAYS the boys. They had always had someone else to do their laundry and had no idea. One rich kid who was the exception - he was an old classmate of mine from high school and president of the student council, I was there when he gave the idiot responsible in this case, a thorough dressing down and a lesson in how to use the laundry facilities.

difficult child 1 can be thick sometimes, but we taught him how to use the washing machine. He has broghut over his and daughter in law's washing sometimes, he can do it all by himself these days. I also taught the kids the best way to hang out washing in order to avoid having to use an iron.

My main failing - I never taught them how to iron. Because I haven't had to iron for years.

Marg

 

[AnnieO]

I don't iron. Ironing is NOT happening.

I own one, and my mom taught me on pillow cases. But - I use it when I am making curtains or other craftsy stuff. I don't iron. So the kids will have to learn from someone else.

As for the ratmaze that is my house - yes, it goes on and on - but the most likely hiding spots are where it is most likely to get cobwebby and spidery. YECH! I don't do spiders. WAIT... We DO have that spare bedroom... HMM!

 

[trinityroyal]

I don't iron. Ironing is NOT happening.

Maybe it's an Aspie thing, but I love ironing. Something about bringing order to chaos, and making everything nice and flat with the little creases in the trouser legs...

(Or maybe I'm just weird)