Back in the Twilight Zone...
husband and I conduct periodic backpack checks and bedroom searched-but last night, we decided we would search with a goal in mind...if we found no stolen items and no candy/gum or anything else she's not supposed to be stashing in her room...we were going to make a big deal out of it and reward her by re-installing her bedroom door.
Unfortunately, we found a new stash of razor blades in her purse (the kind you get out of a utility knife).
difficult child just got really angry and explained that she "needs" those for when she gets mad....and besides, if we take her razor blades, she'll just stab herself with the needles from the sewing kit instead [[mental note: hide the sewing kit]].
husband tried to speak to difficult child calmly and rationally and the gist of difficult child's response was that if she's forced to continue living with us--she will kill herself. She told us that her friend's family had offered to be her legal guardians, but we were so mean that we'd never let difficult child move in with them.
husband said "Call them up--I'll be happy to pack your bags tonight."
So difficult child got really happy and she called--no answer--left a message.
So at the dinner table, difficult child was extra mouthy. Told us that this other family is WAAAAYYYY superior to us because they have waaay more money, the brothers are "cooler' than difficult child's brother, and the parents are better PLUS she'll get to share a room with the sister she always wanted.
OK, no problem.
At about that point, the scarf that difficult child wears around her neck fell a little bit and revealed that she has a combination of hickies and bite marks all over her neck.
Her Dad asks her who's been sucking on her neck. difficult child responds that it's some guy she sees after school, she doesn't know his name...
husband asks her again--difficult child begins shouting that what does he care? What difference does it make? I hate you so much! I hate it here so much.!!
At that point, husband lost it completely, he threw his dinner glass across the room--shattering it into a zillion pices and then he told difficult child "That's it. I give up. You win. You're 'free'. Go. Get out. Don't let the door hit you on your way out." And he walked away.
difficult child's first thought was to challenge him....as in "You can't make me go anywhere!!"...
but then she thought better of it and she put on her shoes and went to her friend's house....and from what I understand...announced to them that she was there to live with them....
Which prompted a very quick phone call to our house.
The friend's family, of course, had NEVER offered such a thing and were a bit defensive about the whole situation (who could blame them?)--but it turns out, that the Mom has a background in psychology and used to work as a unit nurse in the teen ward of a psychiatirc hospital.
This Mom saw through all of difficult child's baloney in an instant....and spent a couple of hours talking to her about making the right choices and how she is going to get herself arrested if she doesn't stop with the threats and aggression and how difficult child is going to get herself in the hospital if she doesn't stop with the dangerous and self-endangering activities.
Then I went over to take difficult child home, and I got to speak with this woman myself. What a wonderful person she turned out to be! She has all kinds of experience with this just sort of thing and had lots of wisdom and advice. She even offered to make a few calls to professionals that she knows and see if anyone has anything to recommend.
I told her I'd love to move in with her myself!! I could see why difficult child picked them...
So I took difficult child home. difficult child was completely angry and miserable--wouldn't even look at me or say two words--and stomped off to bed.
So--I guess we'll see what happens today...
--DaisyFace
husband and I conduct periodic backpack checks and bedroom searched-but last night, we decided we would search with a goal in mind...if we found no stolen items and no candy/gum or anything else she's not supposed to be stashing in her room...we were going to make a big deal out of it and reward her by re-installing her bedroom door.
Unfortunately, we found a new stash of razor blades in her purse (the kind you get out of a utility knife).
difficult child just got really angry and explained that she "needs" those for when she gets mad....and besides, if we take her razor blades, she'll just stab herself with the needles from the sewing kit instead [[mental note: hide the sewing kit]].
husband tried to speak to difficult child calmly and rationally and the gist of difficult child's response was that if she's forced to continue living with us--she will kill herself. She told us that her friend's family had offered to be her legal guardians, but we were so mean that we'd never let difficult child move in with them.
husband said "Call them up--I'll be happy to pack your bags tonight."
So difficult child got really happy and she called--no answer--left a message.
So at the dinner table, difficult child was extra mouthy. Told us that this other family is WAAAAYYYY superior to us because they have waaay more money, the brothers are "cooler' than difficult child's brother, and the parents are better PLUS she'll get to share a room with the sister she always wanted.
OK, no problem.
At about that point, the scarf that difficult child wears around her neck fell a little bit and revealed that she has a combination of hickies and bite marks all over her neck.
Her Dad asks her who's been sucking on her neck. difficult child responds that it's some guy she sees after school, she doesn't know his name...
husband asks her again--difficult child begins shouting that what does he care? What difference does it make? I hate you so much! I hate it here so much.!!
At that point, husband lost it completely, he threw his dinner glass across the room--shattering it into a zillion pices and then he told difficult child "That's it. I give up. You win. You're 'free'. Go. Get out. Don't let the door hit you on your way out." And he walked away.
difficult child's first thought was to challenge him....as in "You can't make me go anywhere!!"...
but then she thought better of it and she put on her shoes and went to her friend's house....and from what I understand...announced to them that she was there to live with them....
Which prompted a very quick phone call to our house.
The friend's family, of course, had NEVER offered such a thing and were a bit defensive about the whole situation (who could blame them?)--but it turns out, that the Mom has a background in psychology and used to work as a unit nurse in the teen ward of a psychiatirc hospital.
This Mom saw through all of difficult child's baloney in an instant....and spent a couple of hours talking to her about making the right choices and how she is going to get herself arrested if she doesn't stop with the threats and aggression and how difficult child is going to get herself in the hospital if she doesn't stop with the dangerous and self-endangering activities.
Then I went over to take difficult child home, and I got to speak with this woman myself. What a wonderful person she turned out to be! She has all kinds of experience with this just sort of thing and had lots of wisdom and advice. She even offered to make a few calls to professionals that she knows and see if anyone has anything to recommend.
I told her I'd love to move in with her myself!! I could see why difficult child picked them...
So I took difficult child home. difficult child was completely angry and miserable--wouldn't even look at me or say two words--and stomped off to bed.
So--I guess we'll see what happens today...
--DaisyFace
