I hear what you say. It's just that however "right" the advice she is given might be, she is the person she is with her own limitations, and that is the best she can do at this stage of her life with powers that she has. She obviously has those powers and no more. And there are many people that no matter how many times you say to them what is "true" and what is "right," they just don't get it. They see things from where THEY are at, not from where YOU are at. That's the way it goes. We are all, in our own way, difficult children, and so is Stands.
It is frustrating to be 100 percent sure you are right and still not to be able to get it over to someone else, I agree.
But to write like that, with anger, impatience, without any compassion. What is this? There is more than one angle to any situation, we all know that. Stands is suffering, in her own way. Why add to her suffering? Why not write more gently? Or why not just NOT WRITE! That is one of the great beauties of the internet -- if you want to ignore it, you can. So ignore it.
Sometimes one has no strength left to do anything except to moan. In my humble opinion, that is also legitimate here on this board.
I do not think that the point of this board is to hurt someone else's feelings. The real bottom line of my anger is because I think Stands's feelings might be hurt unnecessarily. That is not the aim here. Other members don't have to vent their spleen because they feel frustrated. Yes, it is frustrating to read it and see that she is making the same mistake over and over, but it is not our job to preach and be haughty and nasty. One can say the exact same things with compassion and understanding -- and probably get through much better that way.
My argument is not over WHAT is being said here. It is about HOW it is being said. I know that whenever I post, I read over what I have written and edit it, and change things -- I'll do anything in order NOT to add to someone's hurt. Because whoever writes here is hurting. Don't we all know it!!
I think it is important to talk about this, openly. I'm not sorry I brought this subject up. I think sometimes people are too sure of themselves, and we should all remember to have just a little bit of humility when we write. After all, when all is said and done, each and every one of us is only human, and makes mistakes, and doesn't know everything best. Advice is one thing -- preaching is another (and preaching doesn't have to be religious in order to be unbearable).
Esther
