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General Parenting
Adoption, the Unknown, and Fetal Alcohol Exposure
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 374676" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>That is what I was trying to explain. WHat WW is describing, sounds exactly like we have been dealing with in difficult child 3 (including the degree of it). And I know difficult child 3 cannot have Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS).</p><p></p><p>But I do agree - if there is concern, get it checked out. But be careful of the "seek and ye shall find" phenomenon, where you go to see someone who is an expert in their field, and it turns out they're an expert because everyone they see gets the same diagnosis, rightly or wrongly.</p><p></p><p>So I would suggest finding someone who is familiar with Asperger's and also familiar with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS), to thoroughly evaluate. A neuropsychologist assessment with this in mind would hopefully confirm or refute. It would probably provide a lot of other useful information along the way.</p><p></p><p>One very important thing to never forget - whatever the problem, this kid (and others like him) is a combination of the underlying disorder, and the way it makes him feel emotionally (which is the environmental component). It is natural for a kid with either Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) or Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) (or other disorders) to feel angry, frustrated and depressed at various times. Those emotions run really deep and to a suicidal extent at times. Understanding of what is wrong with them can help them feel better about themselves, especially when they realise it's not their fault. It doesn't mean they don't have a lot of work to put in, but knowing that there is help and they are underneath, good people - they do cope better emotionally after that. And once a kid begins to cope better emotionally, the raging eases up a bit.</p><p></p><p>So don't necessarily blame the disorder directly for the raging, but blame how the kid feels due to the problems the disorder causes in his life (and yours).</p><p></p><p>it's a subtle distinction but it can make a big difference.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 374676, member: 1991"] That is what I was trying to explain. WHat WW is describing, sounds exactly like we have been dealing with in difficult child 3 (including the degree of it). And I know difficult child 3 cannot have Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS). But I do agree - if there is concern, get it checked out. But be careful of the "seek and ye shall find" phenomenon, where you go to see someone who is an expert in their field, and it turns out they're an expert because everyone they see gets the same diagnosis, rightly or wrongly. So I would suggest finding someone who is familiar with Asperger's and also familiar with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS), to thoroughly evaluate. A neuropsychologist assessment with this in mind would hopefully confirm or refute. It would probably provide a lot of other useful information along the way. One very important thing to never forget - whatever the problem, this kid (and others like him) is a combination of the underlying disorder, and the way it makes him feel emotionally (which is the environmental component). It is natural for a kid with either Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) or Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) (or other disorders) to feel angry, frustrated and depressed at various times. Those emotions run really deep and to a suicidal extent at times. Understanding of what is wrong with them can help them feel better about themselves, especially when they realise it's not their fault. It doesn't mean they don't have a lot of work to put in, but knowing that there is help and they are underneath, good people - they do cope better emotionally after that. And once a kid begins to cope better emotionally, the raging eases up a bit. So don't necessarily blame the disorder directly for the raging, but blame how the kid feels due to the problems the disorder causes in his life (and yours). it's a subtle distinction but it can make a big difference. Marg [/QUOTE]
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