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Adult child stealing
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<blockquote data-quote="Tiredof33" data-source="post: 581300" data-attributes="member: 13558"><p>GsingJane,</p><p>It is so very hard, we all on this form can relate to your problems with your son. Mine is 34yo and I feel like I have been going through this forever. Mine started at a very early age and then allowed his friends to steal form me. His is alcohol and drug related.</p><p></p><p>I also think my son has undiagnosied mental problems, definitely anti social personality traits. I have come to think of mine as a sociopath too. They are also very manipulative and will use your guilt to their advantage. Regardless what has happened in the past, you are not responsible for the life he is living now. I struggled with the guilt of having a horrible marriage that resulted in my son having a bad homelife.</p><p></p><p>My son blames me for all of his problems and conned me out of money for months last year. If I had all of the money (and property) my son and his friends have stolen, including all of the programs and bail money, I could go one a very nice vacation.</p><p></p><p>Please take the time to read various posts, and the many books recommended. No parent should have to cut off contact with their child, it is not the 'normal' for parents.</p><p></p><p>BUT, many of us have come to the realization that our helping them is only making them worse. They must learn how to take care of themselves.</p><p></p><p>I know it is hard, but we are wasy prey, and they will take advantage of us until the bleed us dry and not be bothered at all. I finally called the police to stop his 'wacked out' girl friend's harrassment. I let both of them know that I will press charges if they try to steal from me again. So he threatened suicide, and one day he may actually do it. I just know I can't deal with the threats and blame any longer.</p><p></p><p>Be prepared for him to really act out when he knows you are serious!! If you can afford counseling it is a tremendous help. Posting here, even if it is just to vent, helps. I also keep a journal, meditate, exercise, and have many hobbies to keep me busy. It still hurts but I try to turn it over to my HP as much as I can.</p><p></p><p>I never in a million years would have believed I would have a child like him and still be going through this so long. They are not your typical child and they are adults now. Regardless of you son's medical issues he is an adult and should be held responsible for his actions.</p><p></p><p>(((huggs and blessings for us all)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiredof33, post: 581300, member: 13558"] GsingJane, It is so very hard, we all on this form can relate to your problems with your son. Mine is 34yo and I feel like I have been going through this forever. Mine started at a very early age and then allowed his friends to steal form me. His is alcohol and drug related. I also think my son has undiagnosied mental problems, definitely anti social personality traits. I have come to think of mine as a sociopath too. They are also very manipulative and will use your guilt to their advantage. Regardless what has happened in the past, you are not responsible for the life he is living now. I struggled with the guilt of having a horrible marriage that resulted in my son having a bad homelife. My son blames me for all of his problems and conned me out of money for months last year. If I had all of the money (and property) my son and his friends have stolen, including all of the programs and bail money, I could go one a very nice vacation. Please take the time to read various posts, and the many books recommended. No parent should have to cut off contact with their child, it is not the 'normal' for parents. BUT, many of us have come to the realization that our helping them is only making them worse. They must learn how to take care of themselves. I know it is hard, but we are wasy prey, and they will take advantage of us until the bleed us dry and not be bothered at all. I finally called the police to stop his 'wacked out' girl friend's harrassment. I let both of them know that I will press charges if they try to steal from me again. So he threatened suicide, and one day he may actually do it. I just know I can't deal with the threats and blame any longer. Be prepared for him to really act out when he knows you are serious!! If you can afford counseling it is a tremendous help. Posting here, even if it is just to vent, helps. I also keep a journal, meditate, exercise, and have many hobbies to keep me busy. It still hurts but I try to turn it over to my HP as much as I can. I never in a million years would have believed I would have a child like him and still be going through this so long. They are not your typical child and they are adults now. Regardless of you son's medical issues he is an adult and should be held responsible for his actions. (((huggs and blessings for us all))) [/QUOTE]
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