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General Parenting
Advice for family on the edge?
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<blockquote data-quote="Shari" data-source="post: 363740" data-attributes="member: 1848"><p>I lucked out with difficult child 1, so far, but if I could go back, I'd stop doing things that he "should" be able to do because of his age, and base what I did based on what he could handle, without regard to that magic "age" thing. It was pure luck things worked out as they did, and honestly, it could have, and could still, go either way.</p><p>***</p><p>He needed supervision til he was 16. At 13 and 14, I let it slide and let him stay home. At 15 and 16, I sent him to my dad's for the summer so he wouldn't burn down the house.</p><p>***</p><p>He needed psychiatric hospital placement at 15. I didn't do it for fear of what his dad would do. He needed it. Again, we lucked out that it turned out ok, but it very easily could have turned out far worse.</p><p>***</p><p>Care for a child with even "just" an ADHD diagnosis is deductible on your taxes just like daycare for a younger child.</p><p>***</p><p>Hire a high school girl to take her to the pool and the movies. But don't give in to her age and let some irrelevant number dictate how she's handled.</p><p>***</p><p>I have an 8yr old Wee difficult child now....and I'm following my own advice with him. He's 5. In most areas,he's 5, so we deal accordingly. </p><p>***</p><p>As for moving to dad's, I'm not sure...if you don't let her go, she'll retaliate even more; if you do, who knows. But if you do, I am with KT in that you make her stick it out, not run back and forth. That's such a tough call to make, and my views are so biased.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shari, post: 363740, member: 1848"] I lucked out with difficult child 1, so far, but if I could go back, I'd stop doing things that he "should" be able to do because of his age, and base what I did based on what he could handle, without regard to that magic "age" thing. It was pure luck things worked out as they did, and honestly, it could have, and could still, go either way. *** He needed supervision til he was 16. At 13 and 14, I let it slide and let him stay home. At 15 and 16, I sent him to my dad's for the summer so he wouldn't burn down the house. *** He needed psychiatric hospital placement at 15. I didn't do it for fear of what his dad would do. He needed it. Again, we lucked out that it turned out ok, but it very easily could have turned out far worse. *** Care for a child with even "just" an ADHD diagnosis is deductible on your taxes just like daycare for a younger child. *** Hire a high school girl to take her to the pool and the movies. But don't give in to her age and let some irrelevant number dictate how she's handled. *** I have an 8yr old Wee difficult child now....and I'm following my own advice with him. He's 5. In most areas,he's 5, so we deal accordingly. *** As for moving to dad's, I'm not sure...if you don't let her go, she'll retaliate even more; if you do, who knows. But if you do, I am with KT in that you make her stick it out, not run back and forth. That's such a tough call to make, and my views are so biased. [/QUOTE]
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