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Advice needed - mother who is a difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 160563" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I grew up with a mother who was extremely abusive to me in just about every way you can name. The emotional abuse was most definitely the hardest to deal with. We have no doubt that those scars from the earliest abuse are what led me to my borderline diagnosis. </p><p></p><p>I tried my entire life to get my mother to love me. I really dont know why she couldnt. I remember when she died, I finally broke down and cried buckets of tears because she could never tell me that she really did love me. I knew intellectually that the time had long passed that she could perform that action because she had alzheimers but her dying took that sliver of hope away. And heck...even if she had been perfectly sane I dont think she would have ever told me. Ok...maybe sane isnt the word because a sane mother wouldnt have treated me that way.</p><p></p><p>I often think I would have been far better off to have cut my mom out of my life very early on but I couldnt do it. I couldnt even walk away when she got so ill and needed to be taken care of. She might not have cared about me but I had to be able to look at myself in the mirror so I did what I felt I had to do. </p><p></p><p>I did my best and I can sleep at night.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 160563, member: 1514"] I grew up with a mother who was extremely abusive to me in just about every way you can name. The emotional abuse was most definitely the hardest to deal with. We have no doubt that those scars from the earliest abuse are what led me to my borderline diagnosis. I tried my entire life to get my mother to love me. I really dont know why she couldnt. I remember when she died, I finally broke down and cried buckets of tears because she could never tell me that she really did love me. I knew intellectually that the time had long passed that she could perform that action because she had alzheimers but her dying took that sliver of hope away. And heck...even if she had been perfectly sane I dont think she would have ever told me. Ok...maybe sane isnt the word because a sane mother wouldnt have treated me that way. I often think I would have been far better off to have cut my mom out of my life very early on but I couldnt do it. I couldnt even walk away when she got so ill and needed to be taken care of. She might not have cared about me but I had to be able to look at myself in the mirror so I did what I felt I had to do. I did my best and I can sleep at night. [/QUOTE]
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Advice needed - mother who is a difficult child
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