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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 697708" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>No, J is not sexually acting out or hurting animals. I have seen him squashing bugs but most little boys seem to do that, alas. He does continue to have meltdowns on a regular basis but mainly he is not violent, or certainly not physically. He sometimes has really horrible behaviour but is basically a kind-hearted and "reachable" kid underneath. I was not trying to say that he has this form of reactive attachment disorder but I DO know something about it and J and I do have attachment problems, for various reasons. A kind of insecure attachment, as GoingNorth refers to. Obviously what Lovelife is dealing with her is an extremely severe form of behaviour that is more akin to psychopathy (I say that without judgement of the child) and it must indeed be extremely distressing to see a young child finding the pain of other creatures amusing and seemingly unable to bond. I can see that he probably needs something much more than Lovelife and her husband can offer because the intervention is now coming too late in the day and will not get "better" without intense support. I even fantasise, quite often actually, about sending J to a residential school for his own good because he so needs to learn to respect boundaries and regulate his own behaviour - and because life with him is often so very challenging. For all that he is such a lovely kid. And underneath this kid that Lovelife is having to "give up" was once a lovely kid too. That is what is sad.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 697708, member: 11227"] No, J is not sexually acting out or hurting animals. I have seen him squashing bugs but most little boys seem to do that, alas. He does continue to have meltdowns on a regular basis but mainly he is not violent, or certainly not physically. He sometimes has really horrible behaviour but is basically a kind-hearted and "reachable" kid underneath. I was not trying to say that he has this form of reactive attachment disorder but I DO know something about it and J and I do have attachment problems, for various reasons. A kind of insecure attachment, as GoingNorth refers to. Obviously what Lovelife is dealing with her is an extremely severe form of behaviour that is more akin to psychopathy (I say that without judgement of the child) and it must indeed be extremely distressing to see a young child finding the pain of other creatures amusing and seemingly unable to bond. I can see that he probably needs something much more than Lovelife and her husband can offer because the intervention is now coming too late in the day and will not get "better" without intense support. I even fantasise, quite often actually, about sending J to a residential school for his own good because he so needs to learn to respect boundaries and regulate his own behaviour - and because life with him is often so very challenging. For all that he is such a lovely kid. And underneath this kid that Lovelife is having to "give up" was once a lovely kid too. That is what is sad. [/QUOTE]
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