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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 695291" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>It's very hard when you and your husband are at different points. Jabber and I are kind of the opposite of you Alb. He's much more ready to say, "Done! Let the chips fall where they may." I'm still trying to keep the chips from falling. By the same token, my son talks to me, (yells at me, fights with me), MUCH more often than his dad. I think this actually bothers Jabber for two reasons. #1, He hates seeing me hurt and stressed when things are bad. He hates that our son upsets me. #2, Just the same, I think he feels excluded. He's complained that our son only talks to me...but I don't think he sees why that happens. I'm free to take calls more often. He's worked in a prison and it's hard to call him. Our son is simply <em>used</em> to calling me and I'm <em>mom</em>. He's just different with me than he is with dad. But more, I'm more sympathetic. I'm easier to get to say "yes". And I'm alone with our son more. We're in a car a lot, (not looking at each other, which makes it easier to talk) because I give him rides and we do a lot of our talking then. </p><p></p><p>I digress...sorry. But it's hard for us sometimes too and I've thought often that, if Jabber and I ever have a <em>real</em> fight - as in shouting and such, we don't DO that, never have - it'll be about our son. There's not a doubt in my mind. </p><p></p><p>I agree on the blocking on Facebook. Double check, but I think you can still to on without being logged in and view his public posts to see if he's okay.</p><p></p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/grouphug.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":grouphug:" title="grouphug :grouphug:" data-shortname=":grouphug:" /></p><p>I wish these were real too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 695291, member: 17309"] It's very hard when you and your husband are at different points. Jabber and I are kind of the opposite of you Alb. He's much more ready to say, "Done! Let the chips fall where they may." I'm still trying to keep the chips from falling. By the same token, my son talks to me, (yells at me, fights with me), MUCH more often than his dad. I think this actually bothers Jabber for two reasons. #1, He hates seeing me hurt and stressed when things are bad. He hates that our son upsets me. #2, Just the same, I think he feels excluded. He's complained that our son only talks to me...but I don't think he sees why that happens. I'm free to take calls more often. He's worked in a prison and it's hard to call him. Our son is simply [I]used[/I] to calling me and I'm [I]mom[/I]. He's just different with me than he is with dad. But more, I'm more sympathetic. I'm easier to get to say "yes". And I'm alone with our son more. We're in a car a lot, (not looking at each other, which makes it easier to talk) because I give him rides and we do a lot of our talking then. I digress...sorry. But it's hard for us sometimes too and I've thought often that, if Jabber and I ever have a [I]real[/I] fight - as in shouting and such, we don't DO that, never have - it'll be about our son. There's not a doubt in my mind. I agree on the blocking on Facebook. Double check, but I think you can still to on without being logged in and view his public posts to see if he's okay. :grouphug: I wish these were real too. [/QUOTE]
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