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Substance Abuse
Alcohol served around difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 397131" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>with difficult child being so very newly, and tentatively, sober, your relatives were out of line. They may not have realized the effects their actions could have on her, but they sure showed how much respect they have for YOU and your daughter. It took us 2 or 3 YEARS before we were comfortable having a single drink around my gfgbro after he got sober. He is one of those very rare people who had a relapse about a month after he left rehab and other than that has been successfully sober for almost 8 years. We didn't even know about the relapse until about a year after we became comfortable drinking around him. I actually have never had a drink around him since Wiz was born, but that is because after I got pregnant I found I get very ill if I drink even one weak drink. Hours of bowel spasms and nausea are just not worth it. Heck, we even hid the vanilla when gfgbro was around because I use vanilla beans in rum or vodka.</p><p> </p><p>It is just WRONG of your family to be so disrespectful. in my opinion this is NOT soemthing to let slide. You may or may not choose to speak with them, but next time they want you to do something for them, or to visit, I would be unavailable or unable to do so and would tell them that it is a direct result of the disrespectful way they treated your request on Christmas. If they have problems with that, well, maybe it speaks to their own alcohol problems. Alcoholism isn't called a family disease because it only effects your parents and siblings, Know what I mean??? Often if you take a long, sober look at the past generations and the various limbs on the family tree you can see a whole lot of alcohol related problems. I know in our family it wasn't just gfgbro. My father and mother have each had times when they used booze as a crutch. Going back on the family tree I have grandparents, aunts, uncles and great grands with alcoholism, not to mention all the problems in the families my relatives married into.</p><p> </p><p>It is hard when you start to really see the problems in the family, and to see how it really does impact your life. It is one reason that the entire family NEEDS to go to Alanon. It not only helps the addict stay sober, it helps the rest of you realize and heal from your part in the disease. </p><p> </p><p>I am sorry it was so uncomfortable.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 397131, member: 1233"] with difficult child being so very newly, and tentatively, sober, your relatives were out of line. They may not have realized the effects their actions could have on her, but they sure showed how much respect they have for YOU and your daughter. It took us 2 or 3 YEARS before we were comfortable having a single drink around my gfgbro after he got sober. He is one of those very rare people who had a relapse about a month after he left rehab and other than that has been successfully sober for almost 8 years. We didn't even know about the relapse until about a year after we became comfortable drinking around him. I actually have never had a drink around him since Wiz was born, but that is because after I got pregnant I found I get very ill if I drink even one weak drink. Hours of bowel spasms and nausea are just not worth it. Heck, we even hid the vanilla when gfgbro was around because I use vanilla beans in rum or vodka. It is just WRONG of your family to be so disrespectful. in my opinion this is NOT soemthing to let slide. You may or may not choose to speak with them, but next time they want you to do something for them, or to visit, I would be unavailable or unable to do so and would tell them that it is a direct result of the disrespectful way they treated your request on Christmas. If they have problems with that, well, maybe it speaks to their own alcohol problems. Alcoholism isn't called a family disease because it only effects your parents and siblings, Know what I mean??? Often if you take a long, sober look at the past generations and the various limbs on the family tree you can see a whole lot of alcohol related problems. I know in our family it wasn't just gfgbro. My father and mother have each had times when they used booze as a crutch. Going back on the family tree I have grandparents, aunts, uncles and great grands with alcoholism, not to mention all the problems in the families my relatives married into. It is hard when you start to really see the problems in the family, and to see how it really does impact your life. It is one reason that the entire family NEEDS to go to Alanon. It not only helps the addict stay sober, it helps the rest of you realize and heal from your part in the disease. I am sorry it was so uncomfortable. [/QUOTE]
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