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Substance Abuse
Alcohol served around difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 397161" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>I'm not sure exactly what my opinion is in this case. I <strong>absolutely </strong>am sorry that it caused discomfort and anger for you and your immediate family. on the other hand difficult child has been a difficult child for a long time and although the extended family is aware of alot of the problems, they have not walked in your shoes. Like we all in the CD family say and have said over the years "thank God for CD as nobody else really understands!"</p><p> </p><p>That being said...it would have been wonderful if they had been able to change their traditions and offer complete support this holiday. In our extended family there are relatives who really, really resent the hardship, isolation and stress that husband and I have endured. They don't "hate" GFGmom, difficult child or easy child/difficult child <strong>but </strong>their effort to provide wholehearted support did not</p><p>last year after year after year. There are homes we don't visit and occasions we skip just to maintain comfort within the family. </p><p> </p><p>So...I understand your disppointment but suggest that you not let it fester. They made some effort evidently and treated difficult child warmly. She may have even felt more comfortable that they did not alter tradition on her behalf. She will be exposed to alcohol and drugs frequently as she matures. Perhaps you can prearrange a signal that she can use if she feels it is best to leave the environment you're in due to her discomfort? You all have a long road ahead and knowing that you and husband have her best interests at heart may strengthen her resolve while not feeling alienated.</p><p> </p><p>Lord knows I sure don't have the answers. My perspective has evolved alot. I've never had that exact experience and each of our difficult child's is different. I'm hoping that in her head and her heart she "felt the love" of a familiar celebration and perhaps told herself later how great she felt enjoying the get together without the triggered need to drink. Hug. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 397161, member: 35"] I'm not sure exactly what my opinion is in this case. I [B]absolutely [/B]am sorry that it caused discomfort and anger for you and your immediate family. on the other hand difficult child has been a difficult child for a long time and although the extended family is aware of alot of the problems, they have not walked in your shoes. Like we all in the CD family say and have said over the years "thank God for CD as nobody else really understands!" That being said...it would have been wonderful if they had been able to change their traditions and offer complete support this holiday. In our extended family there are relatives who really, really resent the hardship, isolation and stress that husband and I have endured. They don't "hate" GFGmom, difficult child or easy child/difficult child [B]but [/B]their effort to provide wholehearted support did not last year after year after year. There are homes we don't visit and occasions we skip just to maintain comfort within the family. So...I understand your disppointment but suggest that you not let it fester. They made some effort evidently and treated difficult child warmly. She may have even felt more comfortable that they did not alter tradition on her behalf. She will be exposed to alcohol and drugs frequently as she matures. Perhaps you can prearrange a signal that she can use if she feels it is best to leave the environment you're in due to her discomfort? You all have a long road ahead and knowing that you and husband have her best interests at heart may strengthen her resolve while not feeling alienated. Lord knows I sure don't have the answers. My perspective has evolved alot. I've never had that exact experience and each of our difficult child's is different. I'm hoping that in her head and her heart she "felt the love" of a familiar celebration and perhaps told herself later how great she felt enjoying the get together without the triggered need to drink. Hug. DDD [/QUOTE]
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