Hi all - I haven't posted any issues for myself in a while. My difficult child is 16. For those who are familiar with my story, he was a no problems kid up until about 2 years ago. That's when he got caught in the spiral of not doing school work, anger and defiance at home and drug use shortly thereafter. He/we have been through a lot. In these 2 years, he was first arrested at school for pot, expelled, went to a boarding school there, got caught with substances multiple times there, went to Wilderness for 3 months, then back to boarding school. Since being back in Sept, his anger and defiance are much better. He has maintained sobriety for 4-6 weeks at a time, but replased twice. He had been in outpatient during that time, but after the second "slip" we took a "leave" from school to homeschool for 6 week and attend intensive outpatient. He did graduate that program successfully and got a TON out of the program and people he met there. Now he is back at the boarding school. Last night was his first night back and I have had several phone calls from him already. He has asked me to sign a permission slip to let him smoke cigarettes there and says he won't make it unless I sign it. I have offerred him the alternative of an e-cigarette, but told him I cannot condone him smoking cigarettes. I ALMOST would agree to it as I just want to him to make it through that program for the next 5 months, but my husband is absolutely UNAPPROACHABLE on the subject. Even though he is a smoker and I am not, he refuses to even discuss it and just says, he is 16, I am not enabling him to smoke. difficult child says, he will not smoke in the house and never around us, but he is hooked and cannot handle quitting right now. If we don't give him permission, he will have to sneak around at school and will end up being kicked out. I have learned many things over the past two years, but this time, I must admit, he has me stumped. To support, or not to support......talk to husband who will be unbending, or not....if I let the chips fall where they may and he gets in trouble and expelled, he would most likely come home to school at alternative which will be a nightmare for my husband and I. I would pursue TBS, but my husband is out of work and we all know how expensive it is. The question is this......is this battle worth the hard line in the sand? I do know he will most likely find another line to challenge, but is this one worth the likely end result??? Thanks for all advisors!