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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 671778" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Carolita, your journey sounds very familiar to me. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>When my precious son started down his path, and I realized he had serious problems with substance abuse, I ran (not walked) back to Al-Anon and this time I was ready. I was really ready to take it all in and change. I started seeing my part in many things, and I started getting humble and honest. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Ok...but...I'm not sure I buy this completely. If your son has the "addiction" gene, it's not about giving up. It's about a trigger(s) that happened, perhaps it was the GED discussion, and his disease progressed. I believe my own son's anxiety and depression and lack of confidence in himself (and whatever else) were triggers for using and then abusing substances. They made him feel better. Problem is, he can't handle substances. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>My son almost has an associate's degree, but dropped out too. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I can see here that you have a lot of recovery under your belt already. Setting these boundaries, letting go more, and getting the support you need while you are doing it...that is your pathway to peace. </p><p></p><p>What is your son's pathway to peace? He will have to discover that. </p><p></p><p>Of course you love him more than anything. when it's time you will be able to see him, fix that favorite meal, hug him and tell him face to face that you love him. Right now, he needs to figure himself out, and start dealing with life on life's terms. </p><p></p><p>And it's time for you to start living your own life. </p><p></p><p>Hang in there...you have what you need to keep walking forward. And we are here for you. Hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 671778, member: 17542"] Carolita, your journey sounds very familiar to me. When my precious son started down his path, and I realized he had serious problems with substance abuse, I ran (not walked) back to Al-Anon and this time I was ready. I was really ready to take it all in and change. I started seeing my part in many things, and I started getting humble and honest. Ok...but...I'm not sure I buy this completely. If your son has the "addiction" gene, it's not about giving up. It's about a trigger(s) that happened, perhaps it was the GED discussion, and his disease progressed. I believe my own son's anxiety and depression and lack of confidence in himself (and whatever else) were triggers for using and then abusing substances. They made him feel better. Problem is, he can't handle substances. My son almost has an associate's degree, but dropped out too. I can see here that you have a lot of recovery under your belt already. Setting these boundaries, letting go more, and getting the support you need while you are doing it...that is your pathway to peace. What is your son's pathway to peace? He will have to discover that. Of course you love him more than anything. when it's time you will be able to see him, fix that favorite meal, hug him and tell him face to face that you love him. Right now, he needs to figure himself out, and start dealing with life on life's terms. And it's time for you to start living your own life. Hang in there...you have what you need to keep walking forward. And we are here for you. Hugs. [/QUOTE]
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