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Am I Missing Something Obvious?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 348017" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>DF, don't be too dismissive. She's not telling you the truth about where the money comes from, she doesn't want to report the theft, so however she had the money, it wouldn't stand scrutiny. If she had acquired the money through winning a bet (or completing a dare), or through re-selling stuff acquired legitimately (including stuff found in dumpsters) then she should feel safe in reporting it.</p><p></p><p>Could she be stealing stuff from home to sell in school?</p><p></p><p>I'd be doing some detective work here. Talk to the lunch ladies (maybe even volunteer in the back rooms where she can't see you; watch to see what she takes for lunch, then when she gets home, ask her hat she ate for lunch and see if her answer matches). Watch not only what she takes, but where she goes with it.</p><p></p><p>Another good one - befriend another kid in her grade (or a few of them). Make sure you befriend kids your daughter wouldn't mix with. Then ask them what they see.</p><p></p><p>Ask the teachers, ask other parents. Especially ask other parents - if their kid is being stood over, other parents may be sure you know and are like that yourself.</p><p></p><p>Next - take samples of the wrappers then go looking to see where such items are sold. Go to that store and find out a few things:</p><p></p><p>1) Is difficult child a customer there?</p><p></p><p>2) Does she buy stuff? If so, how much does she buy? How often?</p><p></p><p>3) Is stuff going missing? Does this shopkeeper have suspicions?</p><p></p><p>4) How does the shopkeeper feel about your daughter?</p><p></p><p>If you get answers you don't like, ask if the shopkeeper has security footage. Maybe even ask if he/she wants to press charges. Or at least report it to police so they can terrify her (hopefully) into going straight.</p><p></p><p>I'm thinking she's making money illicitly (could be sexual favours; could be re-sale of stolen goods) and either spending it herself on lollies, or stealing lollies from other kids or using standover tactics for lollies.</p><p></p><p>Go ahead and report your daughter's report to you of a theft. See how the school staff react. Don't protect her from the consequences of her actions.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 348017, member: 1991"] DF, don't be too dismissive. She's not telling you the truth about where the money comes from, she doesn't want to report the theft, so however she had the money, it wouldn't stand scrutiny. If she had acquired the money through winning a bet (or completing a dare), or through re-selling stuff acquired legitimately (including stuff found in dumpsters) then she should feel safe in reporting it. Could she be stealing stuff from home to sell in school? I'd be doing some detective work here. Talk to the lunch ladies (maybe even volunteer in the back rooms where she can't see you; watch to see what she takes for lunch, then when she gets home, ask her hat she ate for lunch and see if her answer matches). Watch not only what she takes, but where she goes with it. Another good one - befriend another kid in her grade (or a few of them). Make sure you befriend kids your daughter wouldn't mix with. Then ask them what they see. Ask the teachers, ask other parents. Especially ask other parents - if their kid is being stood over, other parents may be sure you know and are like that yourself. Next - take samples of the wrappers then go looking to see where such items are sold. Go to that store and find out a few things: 1) Is difficult child a customer there? 2) Does she buy stuff? If so, how much does she buy? How often? 3) Is stuff going missing? Does this shopkeeper have suspicions? 4) How does the shopkeeper feel about your daughter? If you get answers you don't like, ask if the shopkeeper has security footage. Maybe even ask if he/she wants to press charges. Or at least report it to police so they can terrify her (hopefully) into going straight. I'm thinking she's making money illicitly (could be sexual favours; could be re-sale of stolen goods) and either spending it herself on lollies, or stealing lollies from other kids or using standover tactics for lollies. Go ahead and report your daughter's report to you of a theft. See how the school staff react. Don't protect her from the consequences of her actions. Marg [/QUOTE]
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