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Am I steering my own, true course or heading for the rocks?
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<blockquote data-quote="Ironbutterfly" data-source="post: 743105" data-attributes="member: 19951"><p>I too stay connected but stopped letting his life consume mine. He is schizo and paranoid and learning disabled. I learn to cut him some slack due to his learning disable but I will not see him as a total victim. He is street smart and has made some good decisions on his own so I know he is capable of thinking correctly at times. He calls in a mania and I just let him vent and talk it out. I tell him I have to go and that I love him. I feel good- he gets to vent, I don't discount his thoughts or his choices. The other day he called and wanted me to take him to court and be his guardian. I am ready to go into a group home Mom. I listened. I responded, well that is a thought. Then I changed the subject. I have been here before and I know this is a moment in his time when he feels he wants and needs this. In a week or so he won't even remember he mentioned this. I have learned to just give it time as he swings back and forth in what he is willing to do or change. I have learned that listening and not doing works for me and him. I have learned not to react when he calls with drama about people he doesn't get along with as I know next week they will be friends again. He use to call all the time I want to go to rehab. Ok, I tell him that sounds great I know you will find a way to get there and get into a program. He finally did it. On his own. Maybe just listen for a time, offer nothing for a time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ironbutterfly, post: 743105, member: 19951"] I too stay connected but stopped letting his life consume mine. He is schizo and paranoid and learning disabled. I learn to cut him some slack due to his learning disable but I will not see him as a total victim. He is street smart and has made some good decisions on his own so I know he is capable of thinking correctly at times. He calls in a mania and I just let him vent and talk it out. I tell him I have to go and that I love him. I feel good- he gets to vent, I don't discount his thoughts or his choices. The other day he called and wanted me to take him to court and be his guardian. I am ready to go into a group home Mom. I listened. I responded, well that is a thought. Then I changed the subject. I have been here before and I know this is a moment in his time when he feels he wants and needs this. In a week or so he won't even remember he mentioned this. I have learned to just give it time as he swings back and forth in what he is willing to do or change. I have learned that listening and not doing works for me and him. I have learned not to react when he calls with drama about people he doesn't get along with as I know next week they will be friends again. He use to call all the time I want to go to rehab. Ok, I tell him that sounds great I know you will find a way to get there and get into a program. He finally did it. On his own. Maybe just listen for a time, offer nothing for a time. [/QUOTE]
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Am I steering my own, true course or heading for the rocks?
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