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Parent Emeritus
An Ugly Vent...B4..I Explode or Implode!
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 109327" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Hon, she's just like my husband. Until I FORCED him to stop "borrowing" money from his Mom to pay bills he deliberately neglected to pay (knowing full well she'd cover his fanny), husband was quite content just as he was.</p><p></p><p>mother in law was afraid the kids and I would become homeless, starve, or suffer without utilities. She is a wonderful person. But I told her then that is what would happen. It was time for husband to grow up.</p><p></p><p>And it was rough for many months because husband had screwed up our bills and such so bad that we did without alot. Which of course meant he did without alot too.</p><p></p><p>But we didn't become homeless, nor did we starve.</p><p></p><p>There are county services to help with difficult child's utilities. There are charities to feed and clothe her and your grand daughter. Tons of services are available if she has reason to be motivated to seek them out.</p><p></p><p>I know your heart is in the right place, just as my mother in law's heart was. But you're enabling her to never change this behavior. If something ever were to happen to you difficult child would have to <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" /> it up and figure it all out by herself. So what's wrong with letting her learn to do it while your still around to offer advice and support?</p><p></p><p>I know the dilemma. Nichole is potentially her Dad all over again. (only one of my kids with this tendency) So I'm extra careful to offer as little "help" to her as possible. And any money she wants has to be earned before I'll give it to her. (learned the hard way with that one.)</p><p></p><p>((((hugs))))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 109327, member: 84"] Hon, she's just like my husband. Until I FORCED him to stop "borrowing" money from his Mom to pay bills he deliberately neglected to pay (knowing full well she'd cover his fanny), husband was quite content just as he was. mother in law was afraid the kids and I would become homeless, starve, or suffer without utilities. She is a wonderful person. But I told her then that is what would happen. It was time for husband to grow up. And it was rough for many months because husband had screwed up our bills and such so bad that we did without alot. Which of course meant he did without alot too. But we didn't become homeless, nor did we starve. There are county services to help with difficult child's utilities. There are charities to feed and clothe her and your grand daughter. Tons of services are available if she has reason to be motivated to seek them out. I know your heart is in the right place, just as my mother in law's heart was. But you're enabling her to never change this behavior. If something ever were to happen to you difficult child would have to :censored: it up and figure it all out by herself. So what's wrong with letting her learn to do it while your still around to offer advice and support? I know the dilemma. Nichole is potentially her Dad all over again. (only one of my kids with this tendency) So I'm extra careful to offer as little "help" to her as possible. And any money she wants has to be earned before I'll give it to her. (learned the hard way with that one.) ((((hugs)))) [/QUOTE]
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An Ugly Vent...B4..I Explode or Implode!
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