The last time I saw his parents, Father bounded down the stands of a football stadium, where J. was playing a game, to tell me and Jumper that Jumper was responsible for everything bad in the world...hunger, the Tsunami, the low job rate etc. and his sister gave her friend the middle finger salute when Friend turned around and happened to lock eyes with her. Now J. is begging Jumper to go to T-giving with him because his parents are starting to get scared (GOOD!) and are really afraid that he will leave them. So I guess inviting Jumper to Thanksgiving is part of their showing him that they want to get along...I think. The fact is, this is a very strange family and I was going back and forth on whether or not to allow it. Jumper didn't want to go at first, but now does want to go to make things easier for J. My hub is neutral on it. So I'm the only one with angst. Jumper explained last night that they would be back in time for OUR Thanksgiving later in the day, whicih made me feel tons better, but I still have reservations about J's family...and their motives. His parents never told J. that they were wrong about Jumper. So this is what I did. It was sort of in between what I wanted to do and not allowing her to go at all. Today, which is a day off of work, I called the landline at thier house and left a not unfriendly and rather short message on their voicemai, explaining that I understood that Jumper was invited for thanksgiving, but that we would have to talk before we allowed her to go. I did bring up that last time we saw each other it was messy and that we wanted to know why they changed their minds so that we could be sure Jumper would be safe and I also added that they would have to provide a ride for the kids (hub and I are tired of doing all the back and forth driving...hub has just had more eye surgery and he can't drive at night now. I'm afraid to drive on dark country roads at night). I left my number and said that either one could call...I did not care who. My tone was EXTREMELY calm, almost flat. I made it clear that if they did not call us, Jumper could not go; that another letter would not be acceptable. I actually don't think either will call, which will effectively end Jumper's Thanksgiving at J's house, but I truly hope they do. Do you think I handled this well? Never did I expect my daughter to get this emotionally involved with a young man this early in her life, but the fact is...she is...and he is too. I'm trying to do the best I can.