And she is in jail.....

[PatriotsGirl]

I was woken up by several calls from a Texas phone number last night.. I knew it was from a jail but I assumed a Texas one. Nope. I looked up the inmate list for my daughter's town and she is listed. I called the jail and found out that she had been arrested for battery with no bond. She goes in front of a judge today. I certainly was not bailing her out anyway! Now, should I take the day off of work and go to the courthouse? She is due in front of a judge at 10am. It will really mess me up - workwise if I go. I don't really want to go. I want them to sentence her to rehab!!!!! But I don't know if this judge makes that kind of call....?

 

[StressedM0mma]

Oh PG, I'm sorry. I hope this judge will see her need for rehab, and even if he/she does not normally do that, sentence her to it. And it is easy for me t sit here and say this, but I would not go. Esp. if it is going to mess up your work schedule. Let her face this. Hopefully she will learn something from it, and hopefully the baby was not hurt during the fight.

 

[Nancy]

It's your call but I wouldn't. If she's lucky they will keep her there until the baby is born and social services will take the baby. I'm so sorry PG I know this is devastating but she's had every chance and blown them all.

 

[PatriotsGirl]

You are right - if I show up she will take it as I am rescuing her again and I won't. I want her miserable. I want her to hit bottom. I pray the judge sees the need, too.

She was supposed to go to her first doctor's appointment today and then swore she was going back to rehab....

 

[HaoZi]

I'm sorry hon. *HUGS*

 

[lovemysons]

PG,
On the one hand I am so very sorry to read this news...On the other hand, I am hoping this will be the catalyst that launches difficult child towards better decisions and a better life!

Jail is NOT the worst place should could be right now. She is pregnant and needs care for the baby forced upon her. She will be clean in jail and have time to reflect on how she got to this point.

I do not think you should go to the courthouse today when she is in front of Judge. I think she should handle this on her own. I do, however, think you should figure out exactly what words, what to say, when you do speak with her again.

At this point...as you said, you want her to hit bottom. This NEEDS TO HURT in order for that to happen. She needs to know and feel the full consequence of her behavior and decisions. She is not a helpless child and the law will not treat her as such either.

PG. please know in your heart that you are not at fault in any way. I have seen you offer help over and over again to your difficult child. Now it is time for her to help herself...and the baby.

I think all we can do is pray that this will bring difficult child to her knees. She needs to look for a better way than the one she has sought out so far.

Prayers lifted up that today is a Turning Point in your daughter's life.
Hang in there PG...it CAN be allright.

Hugs,
LMS

 

[exhausted]

I am sorry on one hand and relieved on the other. You have offered everything and tried it all. My only hope is she will tell the judge she is pregnant.
Will they know she is a drug user? She has proved she cannot live without support be it jail or rehab. Please let this be a turning point for her and baby.
Hang in there and know that there are prayers and caring coming your way.

 

[Calamity Jane]

I'm sorry PG.

The only way I'd go is if I could speak with the judge beforehand and plead with him to sentence her to rehab. If you are unable to do that, let the chips fall where they may. The judge may do that anyway. Hugs.

 

[PatriotsGirl]

Texted baby daddy and found out she was arrested for hitting him. He said she was having another one of her rages (brought on by coming down I am sure), and the police showed up. He said when they got there he begged them not to take her but they took her anyway.

He claims he agrees with me and has begged and pleaded for her to go to rehab and she won't go. I told him their lifestyle is SICK and how sad it is that the baby will have a better chance in life in the foster care system than it would have with the two of them.

He also told me one of her childhood friends has gotten into roxies and tried robbing them the other night. That the "friend" attacked my difficult child and he had to beat him out of the room.

How nice huh? Now can you imagine if there was a baby in the room, too??? WTF are they thinking???? I am so angry at them. Angry at the situation. Guaranteed he will be there waiting when she goes in front of the judge and then they will probably go right back to what they were doing before she was arrested. SICK.

 

[recoveringenabler]

I'm very sorry PG, what a struggle for you. Sending prayers for you and your difficult child.............

 

[PatriotsGirl]

I called and left a voicemail with the court. Praying they call back before she sees the judge...

They have a drug court and a mental health court - praying I can get her help somehow....

 

[AnnieO]

Praying right along with you, sweetheart.

 

[DDD]

Sending supportive hugs your way. DDD

 

[PatriotsGirl]

I am on the phone with the courts!! They are going to help me - a little anyway. They are setting bond conditions that will include random drug screening and pre-trial diversion? Would include drug and alcohol counseling and any treatment recommendation. She will have a bond set today, but he can't bail her out and I won't, so I don't know who else would...praying she is kept in jail for a while....please cross everything that this will be bottom....

 

[Signorina]

Oh PG, I am thinking and hoping and praying along with you. Please stay in touch and let us know how it goes. I am hoping this is the turning point. Xo

 

[recoveringenabler]

Everything crossed, prayers sent. Good job PG..........hugs to you.............

 

[AppleCori]

Praying for your situation!

Jail actually sounds much better than the situation she is currently in with boyfriend.

Maybe she will get medical care, decent meals, and no access to drugs while there!

Can they send her to a treatment center/rehab till the baby is born? That would be the best thing.

Does boyfriend see that their lifestyle is in no way conducive to raising a child? That they are not ready to be parents? That the child will be taken away from them if they continue to live this way and put into foster care? That adoption would be best for all involved? That the child may have problems that must be dealt with if mom has been using drugs while pg? Can he put the needs of the child that he claims to love ahead of his own desires?

Geez! How sad.

 

[buddy]

I pray they take her being pregnant into consideration and put her in an inpt drug program......glad they listened to you!

Hugs.....

 

[Nancy]

I'm hoping also with you PG, but I worry that with such a light consequence it will mean nothing to her. I truly hope they do follow that up with treatment recommendations including inpatient.

 

[PatriotsGirl]

I feel better knowing I did something. At least I know he cannot bail her out as he is the victim. I won't bail her out. I pray no one else does either...they would be stupid to bail her out - I wouldn't trust her.

The longer she is there, the better. Think I will sleep pretty good tonight...

The hearing is at 2pm today....please pray she remains put.