I'm posting this here because it's more easy child/typical teen thing rather than difficult child related. There is absolutely I can personally nothing say or do about this but I did give advice to Duckie because she's so upset. Duckie's bff has developed a habit of tearing her down, especially when they are in the same activity. I think Bff is an incredibly insecure girl that really has an over-the-top need to be the top girl. She's smart. pretty and talented but doesn't have a lot of follow-through. And she gets jealous of Duckie when she works very hard and Bff does not. It all started last spring when Duckie worked very hard preparing for an audition for a play, Bff did not. Duckie wowed the director and was cast with a supporting role while Bff wasn't cast. Then Bff swore up and down that she was going to Girl Scout camp, but never told her mom she wanted to go so she never showed. She got upset that Duckie is the 1st seat violist in orchestra and was even more angry when Duckie auditioned for for All-County Orchestra and made it while Bff forgot to turn in the paperwork. Bff gets good grades but Duckie does just a smidge better (mostly because we are religious about homework, projects and studies). She also gets threatened when Duckie hangs out And they've been taking dance together since last year. Duckie re-started with tap after 3 years, Bff has been dancing every year since age three taking three or four classes a year. Duckie had to listen Bff tell her time and time again how behind she was, how she was holding the class back. That, I'm proud to say, just made Duckie work harder to catch up. This year, Duckie is taking tap, jazz and ballet. Bff takes these classes plus hip hop. Bff is constantly pointing out how inferior Duckie is at dancing. Sigh. They have a young teacher that keeps trying to separate them but then Bff is nice again so the cycle begins again. Duckie was very upset last night after dance. A few of the girls behave horribly during dance, they are talkative and disruptive. They run around the building between classes and always get back late. Bff is one of them but Duckie is not (since I am there, I'm sure). They take tap then jazz on Friday. Duckie is very good at tap (especially being a second year, in my humble opinion). She works hard and practices at home.... and it shows. They start jazz with a lot of stretching. This is very good for Duckie because even though she has hyper-mobile joints her muscles in her legs, lower back and hips have always been very tight. She's shown a great deal of progress this year: she nearly has a right split and she can bring her right leg up behind her and touch the back of her head. This absolutely infuriated Bff because, frankly, Duckie has caught up and maybe even passed her when it comes to flexibility. Also, some of the girls got in trouble (Bff included) for running the halls and Bff was mad that Duckie was a goody-goody and didn't get in trouble. Well, duh, Duckie took a drink from her water bottle and changed shoes for jazz. She's not going to run and around and be disruptive when mom is out in the hall. I mean, she's a difficult child but she's not stupid. Duckie was very hurt by the time she left last night. She was quiet (a rarity) and kept to herself. I had to push and pry to get it out of her. She said she feels stupid, ugly and like she's bad at everything. I told her, that while I think Bff is basically a great girl, she's very insecure and wants Duckie to feel that way too. I also told Duckie she needs to to be pretty verbally forceful with Bff to make her stop. Even put her hand up and say "STOP!!!" really loud during class so the teacher knows to intervene. I told her that she can put Bff in her place ("Why don't you worry about yourself?" or "Don't blame me if I come to class prepared and you don't!") but she mustn't be hurtful or cruel. I also told her that Bff will either straighten up or may drop Duckie as a friend, but the way she is being treated must not continue. But I also had Duckie list ten friends that would stand with her if that's the case. And I also made her promise to never do less than her best because someone else isn't living up to their potential. Ugh. I hate tween girls!!!!