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Another big meltdown
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 578701" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>StressedtoMax, I can imagine a little of what you go through and how very hard it is. I will be honest with you... I am really hoping and trusting that we do not get to where you are now. J does not have daily meltdowns and since I have been very consciously working on our attachment and our bonding, his behaviour has improved enormously. I so hope this isn't famous last words but he has stopped running off into the village at weekends, for example, is listening much more to what I say. At the same time, I was alarmed by these two huge meltdowns. Usually J stops after about five minutes, doesn't dig in and escalate. rage wildly. This is new behaviour. The first time seemed to arise out of having been punished too harshly at school, and he is continually punished (sent to sit down or stand for a couple of minutes), more than the other kids basically because like so many other places they just don't get it about ADHD and at the moment there is no special programme for him. Here's another rock and a hard place... I know beyond a shadow of doubt an alternative, non-punitive school would be better and freeing for him, and I also know that stability and continuity are VERY good for him. </p><p>Maybe 80 per cent of the time, J is sweet, co-operative, willing to do what I ask and like a "normal" kid. But then we have these big troublespots. It's not like every time I say no to something he has a meltdown, big or small - he doesn't. I don't fully understand what makes this child tick though I am getting better at understanding. Of course I haven't had much skilled professional help...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 578701, member: 11227"] StressedtoMax, I can imagine a little of what you go through and how very hard it is. I will be honest with you... I am really hoping and trusting that we do not get to where you are now. J does not have daily meltdowns and since I have been very consciously working on our attachment and our bonding, his behaviour has improved enormously. I so hope this isn't famous last words but he has stopped running off into the village at weekends, for example, is listening much more to what I say. At the same time, I was alarmed by these two huge meltdowns. Usually J stops after about five minutes, doesn't dig in and escalate. rage wildly. This is new behaviour. The first time seemed to arise out of having been punished too harshly at school, and he is continually punished (sent to sit down or stand for a couple of minutes), more than the other kids basically because like so many other places they just don't get it about ADHD and at the moment there is no special programme for him. Here's another rock and a hard place... I know beyond a shadow of doubt an alternative, non-punitive school would be better and freeing for him, and I also know that stability and continuity are VERY good for him. Maybe 80 per cent of the time, J is sweet, co-operative, willing to do what I ask and like a "normal" kid. But then we have these big troublespots. It's not like every time I say no to something he has a meltdown, big or small - he doesn't. I don't fully understand what makes this child tick though I am getting better at understanding. Of course I haven't had much skilled professional help... [/QUOTE]
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