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General Parenting
Another big meltdown
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<blockquote data-quote="whatamess" data-source="post: 578725" data-attributes="member: 7664"><p>It was explained to me this way: if a child has a desire/need and does not feel this will be heard/acknowledged/met, then the behavior comes out and ramps up. If a child has a trusting relationship where they know their opinion/thoughts will be heard and considered every time, the behavioral ramp up doesn't occur because their words are already doing the job. I had a highly recommended, so very knowledgable autism consultant, recommend that whenever without exception my difficult child asked for a 'break', he was to be given one. So, the goal was for the adults to recognize and reinforce his using words over behavior...every time. And if that meant that he took 30 breaks in one day and didn't escalate- that was SUCCESS! Once the trust was built that his words really could help him get what he needed, then you had a much less stressed and compliant child. So many people think this is manipulation, but it was about feeling safe and trusting. So, it seems J is a bit further in to the immediate ramp up of behavior and really the trust and support of his words need to come first.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="whatamess, post: 578725, member: 7664"] It was explained to me this way: if a child has a desire/need and does not feel this will be heard/acknowledged/met, then the behavior comes out and ramps up. If a child has a trusting relationship where they know their opinion/thoughts will be heard and considered every time, the behavioral ramp up doesn't occur because their words are already doing the job. I had a highly recommended, so very knowledgable autism consultant, recommend that whenever without exception my difficult child asked for a 'break', he was to be given one. So, the goal was for the adults to recognize and reinforce his using words over behavior...every time. And if that meant that he took 30 breaks in one day and didn't escalate- that was SUCCESS! Once the trust was built that his words really could help him get what he needed, then you had a much less stressed and compliant child. So many people think this is manipulation, but it was about feeling safe and trusting. So, it seems J is a bit further in to the immediate ramp up of behavior and really the trust and support of his words need to come first. [/QUOTE]
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Another big meltdown
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