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Substance Abuse
Another family day in rehab
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 378308" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>I am so glad that she is participating and becoming active in her own recovery process. Even if she relapses as a high percentage may, she has a cornerstone built now and the experience to know she CAN do it. She CAN find tools and work them to keep herself on the right path. This program will not be for nothing, and that is hope in itself. I wish her well and hope that this continues and that she can maintain her sobriety when she goes home as well as further healing herself and her issues. It is something to be commended when one goes off to get help they truly need. Step four does sound intimidating so I'm glad to hear she'll be workign on that while in a supportive and structured environment with others there for her. </p><p></p><p>Regarding the genetic portion of this thread, and dry drunk states, etc. I can see why it is a much debated topic. I think it is so individual and I too believe some people have a genetic predisposition and others have alternate causes of their addictions. My S/O was a seriously hard core drinker before we met. When we met, he was trying to "manage" his drinking. I didn't know until I was in deep emotionally. He then went on a dry drunk for several years. We were very happy much of the time, but boy did it rear its ugly head several times. In each instance I required him to leave, that day, no warning, just me saying GO. I couldn't live with that in my life. THen back on teh wagon he'd get and do well, but then the dry drunk would come out in him. It was ugly and from such a passive, gentle and loving man it was shocking to me each and every time. finally I said enough. I loved him with all of my heart but he wasnt' getting any help and I realized he might not be drinking but he sure was not sober, Know what I mean?? Then he fell into a bottle one night, and when I made him leave I didn't take him back. I had one, and only one, conversation with him.I told him how much I did love him and that yes, I even believed in him. I knew he could do it RIGHT. But could and would were two different things. And I couldn't and wouldn't stick around while he wasn't getting serious about changing his life. We didn't speak for about 7-8 months. He drank heavily for a couple of months. Then something changed in him and he for the first time was able to admit to himself that he needed help and that staying sober wasn't enough, he needed true sobriety. Many many months later, after working on himself, getting support in the right way, we spoke again. It took several months for my faith this was real to emerge and I agreed to give him another chance. I can tell you I have no regrets. I see the difference from dry drunk state to sober state. And it is enormous. It seems your daughter is at that place too. Sounds like she is committed to making it work. If that remains, even if she falters, she is on her way to making it life long. I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 378308, member: 4264"] I am so glad that she is participating and becoming active in her own recovery process. Even if she relapses as a high percentage may, she has a cornerstone built now and the experience to know she CAN do it. She CAN find tools and work them to keep herself on the right path. This program will not be for nothing, and that is hope in itself. I wish her well and hope that this continues and that she can maintain her sobriety when she goes home as well as further healing herself and her issues. It is something to be commended when one goes off to get help they truly need. Step four does sound intimidating so I'm glad to hear she'll be workign on that while in a supportive and structured environment with others there for her. Regarding the genetic portion of this thread, and dry drunk states, etc. I can see why it is a much debated topic. I think it is so individual and I too believe some people have a genetic predisposition and others have alternate causes of their addictions. My S/O was a seriously hard core drinker before we met. When we met, he was trying to "manage" his drinking. I didn't know until I was in deep emotionally. He then went on a dry drunk for several years. We were very happy much of the time, but boy did it rear its ugly head several times. In each instance I required him to leave, that day, no warning, just me saying GO. I couldn't live with that in my life. THen back on teh wagon he'd get and do well, but then the dry drunk would come out in him. It was ugly and from such a passive, gentle and loving man it was shocking to me each and every time. finally I said enough. I loved him with all of my heart but he wasnt' getting any help and I realized he might not be drinking but he sure was not sober, Know what I mean?? Then he fell into a bottle one night, and when I made him leave I didn't take him back. I had one, and only one, conversation with him.I told him how much I did love him and that yes, I even believed in him. I knew he could do it RIGHT. But could and would were two different things. And I couldn't and wouldn't stick around while he wasn't getting serious about changing his life. We didn't speak for about 7-8 months. He drank heavily for a couple of months. Then something changed in him and he for the first time was able to admit to himself that he needed help and that staying sober wasn't enough, he needed true sobriety. Many many months later, after working on himself, getting support in the right way, we spoke again. It took several months for my faith this was real to emerge and I agreed to give him another chance. I can tell you I have no regrets. I see the difference from dry drunk state to sober state. And it is enormous. It seems your daughter is at that place too. Sounds like she is committed to making it work. If that remains, even if she falters, she is on her way to making it life long. I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers! [/QUOTE]
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