I'm sure my difficult child is not unique, tho I used to think she was. That was a long time ago. She'll be 27 next month, and has been using drugs for 10 yrs. She got pregnant when she was 16, and has had 3 children, one of which she put up for adoption. She's never been a real Mom. Everyone else has raised her kids, including us. Up until the last 6 months, I was an enabeler. It feels really good to no longer be that person, but it came with a price. Worrying all the time where your child is, who may be doing what to her, or what she is doing to herself to survive each day was my private hell. I had to seek proffessional help and get on medication. I am so glad I did! She recently went to a rehab facility, (along with her boyfriend). I went to see her after her first two weeks, and it was wonderful to see the sober, intelligent, girl/woman in those beautiful copper colored eyes. I hadnt seen her in so many years, it was like re-birth! Then a week later she and her boy toy left rehab. They've got an apartment and supposedly jobs, but when she came here to tell us this, her eyes were once again glassy looking. I told her she will have to earn our trust. I'm not holding my breath.