Another thing that changes when they become adults

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by dashcat, Sep 6, 2012.

  1. dashcat

    dashcat Member

    When my difficult child was younger (and, as far as I knew at the time, not a difficult child), I made it a point to keep my home open to her friends at all times. We even installed an above-ground pool as a sort of kid-magnet. The funny thing is, her interests were mainly boys ...and she didn't want that gaggle-of-girls sleepovers that I'd had as a teen ...and hoped that she'd enjoy.

    During high school, we were always the ones having the parties. When we had an exchange student, we had a sleepover with 23 girls (exchange students from various grades in the school) Mostly everyone had fun except difficult child, who turned it into a a soap opera.

    And now - here she is at 21 and living at home. Her "friends" (mostly boyfriend and his friends) are in similar living situations.

    And I don't want them here. I don't want to be the "fun" house anymore.

    I just threw a group of them out because I want to go to bed. They are not happy and I really don't care. The thing is - I'm really strict on certain things. No underage drinking (I actually check ids), absolutely no drugs and nobody here (with the exception of one friend (girl) at a time) when I'm sleeping. Now -when I don't want them - they seem to want tocome here. Funny how that is.

  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    We never had a huge group of the kids friends here either but that is because I am such a social hermit. Also my boys werent extremely outgoing. Jamie had 4 close friends who came around and he spent lots of time at their homes too. Cory sort of hung out with them too because two of them were related to us. Most of what they did when hanging out was hunting and fishing or playing video games at someone's home. Also the two related to us were budding musicians and they played music out in their garage. We are boring out

    Now when Jamie moved and Cory ended up with the one having so called friends coming to the house, we had to really lay the law down because these new friends werent the most savory of characters. He finally got the picture when he invited someone to stay in an outbuilding on the property that he met in jail and later he found out the kid went back to jail on an attempted murder charge after he had lived here. That scared the bejeebers out of him.