Another worst Christmas ever story

muttmeister

Well-Known Member
I guess we here should be used to these fiascos by now but I never seem to learn.

I decided to leave my new apartment and go spend Christmas with difficult child 2 and the grandkids. Left yesterday and got there before 3. I had planned to go to town and gas up my car and then load a chair that I wanted to bring back with me so I wouldn't have to do it today. Then I figured we'd have a nice Christmas Eve with soup, etc. like I've had every year for the last 65 years and this morning we'd open presents and have Christmas dinner. What a fool I was!

First, when I got there, daughter-in=law's brother called: he had his kids for Christmas for the first time in about 6 or 7 years. These kids are the ones my older difficult child used to take care of because he was married to their mother until she ran off with somebody else. Anyway, the brother decided his mental health issues were acting up so he asked daughter in law to come and get the kids as he "didn't feel up to having them." So she had to use my car to go an hour there and an hour back; so much for having gas in my car. When they got back, the kids she had gone after were hungry. Her parents had cooked a turkey already so she sent them there. My grandkids had already eaten there. difficult child and d-i-l apparently weren't hungry because nobody made any move to fix anything. I finally microwaved myself a hot dog about midnight.

After the kids went to bed I found out that they basically had no presents. They had one package for each kid from the "Giving Tree" (charity for the poor) and I had brought them each one thing. Nothing from Santa but a little candy in the socks. The thing is, we've always made a BIG DEAL of Christmas in the past. When my kids were little, if it was a good year, they got tons of neat stuff but if it was a bad year they still had tons of presents open: they might have been underwear and socks and toothbrushes and cheap coloring books and pencils but at least they had packages. I know daughter in law had nothing growing up but son should have done better. Middle child got up and came down and looked around kinda bewildered and said, "Did Santa come?" I had already told the grown ups that I'd get them a trampoline when the weather turns to spring so I told the kid that I talked to Santa (I was sleeping in the living room by the tree) and Santa said he wanted them to have a trampoline but it wouldn't fit in the sleigh so I told Santa I'd see that it got delivered this spring. I guess that helped a little.

Then when all of the gift opening was over, daughter in law went to fix the turkey. She had left it in the unheated backroom to thaw but we had especially cold weather so it was still frozen. She said she guessed she'd make hamburger helper for supper and have the turkey tomorrow. I loaded up my stuff and drove 3 hours home and made Chinese for supper.

I know I should be thankful that all of the grandkids are healthy and the whole family has a roof over their heads and the new baby is, of course, perfect, etc. but we have always made such a big deal at Christmas that I really felt cheated and, worse, I feel that my grandkids were cheated.

Next year, I'm either going on an extended vacation or else we'll have Christmas here and I'll remind them how it's done.

What a mess!
 

helpangel

Active Member
What a mess is right! It sounds like a few years ago Thanksgiving at my brother's house - no yams, cranberry anything or pumpkin pie and which one of the pilgrims brought Cheeto's? UGH!!! as soon as I could thaw a turkey did a Thanksgiving DO OVER!

I'm suggesting at the first opportunity you give yourself a do over - if don't have time/finances for a trip maybe a day spa? or a daytrip there is usually some kind of museum, zoo etc within 20 minutes from home have never checked out. I do "at home" vacations all the time get lunchmeat, TV dinners (easy or no prep foods), use paper plates bunch of DVDs, screen calls and consider yourself on vacation but spare yourself travel expense & a motel bill.

Sorry this holiday was a bust, lets figure out how you are going to do this over because you deserve a good one.

Nancy
 

muttmeister

Well-Known Member
Thanks, helpangel. Actually, I'll be doing two do overs: tomorrow a friend is coming in from KC and another friend is here from Tulsa so the 3 of us are going to get together with another friend who lives here in town. I'm sure we'll have fun.
Then, for New Year's Eve I'm having 2 girlfriends here for a pajama party (with margaritas and lots of food).

So I have plenty to look forward to in the next week but I still feel bad for the grandkids.
 

helpangel

Active Member
Understandable feeling bad for grandkids; one year someone at Salvation Army had adopted our family, there was a mistake and Angel's gifts didn't make it to us until after Christmas.

Neighbor called Angel acting like Santa apologizing for the mix up (blamed it on Blinky a new elf) and to send her mom to the secret meetup spot that kids aren't allowed to know where it is to get her gifts.

I had to do something to patch this Angel was so upset she almost hung herself (so close, almost lost her). Her sister & brother had lots of cool gifts and she had a bunch of clothes - her 9yo brain turned it into her psychiatric hospital stays and bipolar blowouts had landed her on the naughty list.

I'm glad you have friends to share margaritas with sounds fun, my bullet blender whips them up quick (a little too quick wink wink) I wish the stores were open my youngest got me the 4th season of Justified on DVD and I like to sip apple pie moonshine while watching Justified LOL.

If you can afford to send the grandkids some gifts... blame it on Blinky thinking they were at your house this year he's always goofing stuff up.

Nancy
 

BusynMember

Well-Known Member
I'm so sorry that your Christmas was dismal...jeez. My oldest kept complaining that due to his custody battle he had no money for presents for his son. He usually saturates the kid with presents and I contribute one or two. This year, although we don't have much money at any time, I sent five presents. Since he is out of town, I used Amazon. There is something about little kids and Christmas...I can't bear the thought of them thinking Santa didn't go to their home...Three of the presents were sports team shirts as grandson is avid sports fan and getting the shirts was not expensive. You'd think that your kids could have at least gone to garage sales or thrift shops and picked up little things during the year...but one thing about difficult children...most don't think about the future.

I love your plans for next year.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
Im sorry. Im with you on kids having a good Xmas no matter what. Even when we were dirt poor we saved up $100 per kid and spent that on them. Tony and I went without for years and still basically do. There is nothing from Kay Jewelers at my house...lol.

I simply cannot make myself not get the grands stuff. I tend to go overboard. I would be heartbroken if one of them didnt get something. Thats one thing that I was rather irritated with Mandy this year. She pretty much waited so she could see what everyone else got the Mouse and plans to go get her some marked down toys later. I think the only thing they got for Monkey was a new bike. Problem is she didnt need one, she has a perfectly good one here that we bought her when she came back from MO. Monkey would have been happier if they had bought her some clothes that fit because I now have to go get her some off the markdown rack.
 

Nancy

Well-Known Member
These stories make me so sad. I too feel bad for the kids. What's wrong with people?

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S

Signorina

Guest
{{{hugs}}} to you Mutt. I think a Christmas vacation in 2014 sound phenomenal.
 

Lothlorien

Active Member
I'm sorry that you had that experience. It's a shame they didn't warn you ahead of time. The dollar store could have made a big difference.

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Nomad

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Yes, that did sound grim! so sorry. Very glad you have nice plans for New Years! Only perused the responses, so this may have already been said....but next year perhaps just send several gifts for the kids and take a mini vacation. Perhaps visit every few years....maybe offer to help make dinner...bring your own turkey! I would do what we usually do...set limits, boundaries, make changes, insulate yourself from craziness.
 
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