Another year, same problems at school

[zachieandameliasmom]

My difficult child started middle school this year. I had hoped it would be an opportunity for a fresh start. Well, the first month or so he did pretty good. He had some bad days, but most were good or fair. Well, the last several weeks his behavior has tanked. He's been in in school suspension 2 times for profanity and last week was suspended for refusing to do his work. They said he couldn't go to ISS again, so they felt out of school suspension was warranted. (Whatever-I find suspension useless) Well, he missed Mon and Tue this week because he got sick with-croup(he has asthma). He was put on steroids for the croup which makes him very irritable. Well, at 920 am I get a call from his sp ed coordinator telling me that he's refusing to do his work again and being disruptive in the classroom. She wanted me to talk to him and see if he would straighten up otherwise she felt he would have to to to ISS again. UGHH So, I sternly talked to him. I didn't hear back from the school. He claims that he did his work the rest of the day. He said he had an incident at the end of the day where they took his hat away. He had it in his backpack and took it out when he was looking for something and they took it from him. He said he freaked a little, but tried hard to regain control of himself. (again all I have is his word on this and his perception of things is often skewed in his favor).

I'm so frustrated with-having these same set of behaviors year after year. And the school doesn't have a solution. They look to me for the solution. It's obvious if I had that we wouldn't be in the situation we are in!! His IEP renewal is next week. I don't know what to tell them to help keep him on task in the classroom.

I'm at the point where I am ready to send him away to boarding/military school!! Even though I don't have the financial means to do so. I'm ready for drastic measures at this point. Something has to give.

Any ideas??? His diagnosis is ADHD. He used to have ODD added in, but I'm not sure if that's on his diagnosis anymore or not.

Thanks.

 

[JJJ]

Wow, 70mg of Vyvanse is a LOT. Was he this irritable before being on that dose?? It might be a medication side effect.

 

[LittleDudesMom]

A couple questions/comments. I do agree that 70 mg is a lot - it appears your sig is old because it lists your difficult child as 10 but he's in middle school? Are the medications still the same? Have there been any recent medication changes?

Obviously there is an IEP because your son is in Special Education. Under what catagory did he qualify for an IEP? Does he have a BIP (behavior intervention plan)?

Since you have the annual review of his IEP next week, now is the time (actually a month ago would have been better!) to start looking into options. I would suggest visiting the wrightslaw website. They have great IEP tools and you can look up supports by diagnosis.

Another thing might be to call the IEP chairman tomorrow and ask that the school district behavior specialists attend the meeting. They usually have experience with kids much more severe than your son but can offer a plethera of suggestions for classroom interventions, etc. Our first fabulous BIP was written by our district's behav spec.

I think susending a kid for work refusal is ridiculous, unless your son was being disrespectful and disruptive - in that case ISS would be the answer. Sounds like the school doesn't want to deal. Listen, work refusal is a big issue with our add, aggresive boys. My son had big issues with this in elem school and has from time to time in middle school. He knows, however, that any classwork not completed are homework in our house. This is really effective because he would much rather be doing something else when at home and he knows I mean business when it comes to school work and homework.

A better option would be for the teacher to gently and quietly remind your son that any work not completed now must be done at home. Should he choose to not do the work, he must sit quietly and not be disruptive. You would be suprised how many kids come back to their work after five or ten minutes. Part of the issue could also be frustration with the work because of an Learning Disability (LD). When was the last time he was tested?

You really need to work hard on making sure that the SCHOOL steps up to the plate and handles these issues IN school. Check out that website - it has helped me plenty over the years!

Sharon

 

[tntimaging]

Wow! New to this group and reading zachieandameliasmom's story was like reading my own except that we have finally found a school/district (6/3) wanting to do something with my 'finally' diagnosis'd 12 year old son. Apparently no one else could look at his records and say there is more than behaviors at issue here.

Hoping to find suggestions and balance having someone to talk to.

Tammie

 

[zachieandameliasmom]

Thanks for your responses. My sig is old I guess! OOPS! But, yes, he is on the 70 mg vyvanse. He was switched from adderall xr(can't remember the dose). We did increase his zoloft to 75 mg a couple of weeks ago. My thought was to help with-the moodiness. I haven't seen any change really. I have a call in to his psychiatrist right now. They haven't called me back though. I also have a call in to his therapist. Again, no call back. We have an appointment with-the therapist next week.

I agree about suspension being pointless. Their reason was that he had been in ISS twice already and they just couldn't keep sending him there. They have a rule that you can't be sent there more then 3 times a quarter. ?? He was sent there the other times for using profanity. Granted one time it was because a girl slapped him in the face and he reacted by calling her a B.

He is under emotionally disturbed for his IEP. He has a behavior plan. I don't know that they did a FBA to write his plan or not. I know last year they consulted with-the specialist for ideas. They were trying to figure out his trigger point for his anger/refusal to do work. They didn't find that trigger point....

I guess my question is what now? I mean we can't keep on doing these same things with-o results.

I have found a school here where we live that does more one on one teaching. People I have asked about it said it's where kids go that have been expelled etc...then others say differently. I don't know!! If you want to look at the site it's www.thearnoldschool.com

I have even pondered military school. But, I'm not sure that method of discipline would be suitable for him. UGHHH I'm so frustrated and desparate to keep him from falling b/t the cracks.

Thanks again