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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 292004" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Is he by any chance enterring 7th grade and changing schools? My 12 yr old says he is both excited and scared to go to the middle school. He is going from a small 3 class classroom of 8 kids to public school of changing rooms and who knows how many kids (probably 30 per classroom).</p><p> </p><p>I think my difficult child's anxiety will grow as each day nears for that 1st day.</p><p> </p><p>Totoro is also onto something about too much time to think. That is my difficult child's largest downfall. Summers can get boring and before my difficult child's hospitalization, he had the most boring summer which he started thinking about his future and it overwhelmed him. A 10 year old can not know how to provide for a family but that was one of his worries, plus passing college classes, ect. I had to convince him that these challenges will not come before he has had a chance to prepare for them.</p><p> </p><p>The severe separation anxiety is something we have had to work to overcome. It is no fun - I had no idea what was wrong with him so I did attend 5th grade with him for about a month (a few weeks sitting at his side, then the back of the class, then the hallway). My child had just fallen apart and with all the somatic symptoms (is that what they are called? chest pains, unable to breathe, ect.), I really thought something horribly medical could be wrong. He had lost all energy and could not function. I would have handled that differently if I had known it was anxiety - I unwittingly fed into it.</p><p> </p><p>12 years old is HARD! You are just starting to break away the bonds with parents to be more independent. You don't really know the boundaries and know just enough to realize that this can be a dangerous world. How can you face growing up alone? (they are not alone but feel like it)</p><p> </p><p>Let us know how this develops. I would talk to his docs about anxiety - you will want to get that under control ASAP if that is what is going on - if it goes too long unchecked, you may have the nightmare situation my difficult child went through because it took a hospitalization to find a doctor to figure it out. Very much a nightmare!</p><p> </p><p>Midwest Mom is also correct! Kids will be mean to the people they feel safest with. They can lash out at you (try to look at it as venting and not personal as they learn how to communicate frustrations) and appear so hateful. It is like they are pushing you away but realizing what that means so are also pulling you back and not letting go. They don't know if they are coming or going.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 292004, member: 5096"] Is he by any chance enterring 7th grade and changing schools? My 12 yr old says he is both excited and scared to go to the middle school. He is going from a small 3 class classroom of 8 kids to public school of changing rooms and who knows how many kids (probably 30 per classroom). I think my difficult child's anxiety will grow as each day nears for that 1st day. Totoro is also onto something about too much time to think. That is my difficult child's largest downfall. Summers can get boring and before my difficult child's hospitalization, he had the most boring summer which he started thinking about his future and it overwhelmed him. A 10 year old can not know how to provide for a family but that was one of his worries, plus passing college classes, ect. I had to convince him that these challenges will not come before he has had a chance to prepare for them. The severe separation anxiety is something we have had to work to overcome. It is no fun - I had no idea what was wrong with him so I did attend 5th grade with him for about a month (a few weeks sitting at his side, then the back of the class, then the hallway). My child had just fallen apart and with all the somatic symptoms (is that what they are called? chest pains, unable to breathe, ect.), I really thought something horribly medical could be wrong. He had lost all energy and could not function. I would have handled that differently if I had known it was anxiety - I unwittingly fed into it. 12 years old is HARD! You are just starting to break away the bonds with parents to be more independent. You don't really know the boundaries and know just enough to realize that this can be a dangerous world. How can you face growing up alone? (they are not alone but feel like it) Let us know how this develops. I would talk to his docs about anxiety - you will want to get that under control ASAP if that is what is going on - if it goes too long unchecked, you may have the nightmare situation my difficult child went through because it took a hospitalization to find a doctor to figure it out. Very much a nightmare! Midwest Mom is also correct! Kids will be mean to the people they feel safest with. They can lash out at you (try to look at it as venting and not personal as they learn how to communicate frustrations) and appear so hateful. It is like they are pushing you away but realizing what that means so are also pulling you back and not letting go. They don't know if they are coming or going. [/QUOTE]
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