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General Parenting
Anyone else dealing with difficult child that seems angry more often than not?
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<blockquote data-quote="lovelyboy" data-source="post: 494035" data-attributes="member: 8045"><p>Yes, we need to deel with alot of this with our son......it drains all the positivity out of situations!</p><p>Unfortunately I dont know your sons diagnosis, age, exct.......but I assume he is preteen?</p><p>From what you describe......relating it to our son: my son is very sensitive to smell......so I dont even take it personal if he says food stinks and makes as if he wants to vomit! What I now do.....is when I know something might bother him, like sause, garlic, ginger, brocoli, exct.....I ask him if he is ok with the smelll.....even if it did bother him, the fact that I asked him and acknoledge his feelings makes it better.....I also warn him, like saying I am going to put boiling water on the doggies food.....if the smell bothers him he must tell me and I will close the door.....or even.....after we have eaten food that smells yucky to him, I make sure to first brush my teeth before I hug him, otherwise he will "rudely" push me away and say I stink......</p><p>Regarding drinking water with food....this sounds VERY autism like.....? Maybe you have mentioned to him in the past not to drink water with food because it is bad for digestion......so in his mind this is a rule....and you guys are braking the rule, causing increased anxiety in him and this leads to anger.....</p><p>Regarding drinking or eating " not right"....when he critisize you.....in our case this is because of my sons anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) traids.....things need to be done in spesific ways.....otherwise again increase in anxiety.....increase in rude behaviour!</p><p>Regarding food being to cold and winter to cold......this is typical with sensory integration problems....but luckily easy to solve.....just heat up the food, give him a nice warm relaxing bath before dinner and make sure he has nice warm pj on and slippers! My son is like that with his porridge! He is worse than goldilocks! It must be just right!!!</p><p>Regarding being mean to little one....if your son is on the autism spectrum.....he might not realize little one is younger, he sees him as being equal.....so he asumes little one must be able to do the things he can.....</p><p>I dont know if you also struggles with difficult child not wanting to use knife and fork......after discussing it with kido he said he doesnt like the weight of the fork, the coldness and even the tecture! He likes the feeling of the food on his fingers.....maybe it gives more sensory feedback? He also doesnt realize or cares how bad his mouth looks like after eating.......</p><p>Good luck with all this....its tricky......but a do think maybe plenty of the behaviour roots from anxiety and not reading all the social cues right......</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovelyboy, post: 494035, member: 8045"] Yes, we need to deel with alot of this with our son......it drains all the positivity out of situations! Unfortunately I dont know your sons diagnosis, age, exct.......but I assume he is preteen? From what you describe......relating it to our son: my son is very sensitive to smell......so I dont even take it personal if he says food stinks and makes as if he wants to vomit! What I now do.....is when I know something might bother him, like sause, garlic, ginger, brocoli, exct.....I ask him if he is ok with the smelll.....even if it did bother him, the fact that I asked him and acknoledge his feelings makes it better.....I also warn him, like saying I am going to put boiling water on the doggies food.....if the smell bothers him he must tell me and I will close the door.....or even.....after we have eaten food that smells yucky to him, I make sure to first brush my teeth before I hug him, otherwise he will "rudely" push me away and say I stink...... Regarding drinking water with food....this sounds VERY autism like.....? Maybe you have mentioned to him in the past not to drink water with food because it is bad for digestion......so in his mind this is a rule....and you guys are braking the rule, causing increased anxiety in him and this leads to anger..... Regarding drinking or eating " not right"....when he critisize you.....in our case this is because of my sons anxiety and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) traids.....things need to be done in spesific ways.....otherwise again increase in anxiety.....increase in rude behaviour! Regarding food being to cold and winter to cold......this is typical with sensory integration problems....but luckily easy to solve.....just heat up the food, give him a nice warm relaxing bath before dinner and make sure he has nice warm pj on and slippers! My son is like that with his porridge! He is worse than goldilocks! It must be just right!!! Regarding being mean to little one....if your son is on the autism spectrum.....he might not realize little one is younger, he sees him as being equal.....so he asumes little one must be able to do the things he can..... I dont know if you also struggles with difficult child not wanting to use knife and fork......after discussing it with kido he said he doesnt like the weight of the fork, the coldness and even the tecture! He likes the feeling of the food on his fingers.....maybe it gives more sensory feedback? He also doesnt realize or cares how bad his mouth looks like after eating....... Good luck with all this....its tricky......but a do think maybe plenty of the behaviour roots from anxiety and not reading all the social cues right...... [/QUOTE]
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Anyone else dealing with difficult child that seems angry more often than not?
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