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General Parenting
Anyone else here struggling with difficult child adult partner too?
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 270588" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>I'm guessing youre in the accounting world......so you should be used to checks and balances. </p><p> </p><p>Why not make a list of checks and balances for your life....and see where it takes you. </p><p> </p><p>Take one issue at a time - draw a line down a piece of paper - and write good on one side and bad on the other - then think of the issue and write...</p><p> </p><p>Fold it up - don't read it for at least a day - then revisit the paper - and see how you feel about each issue you did this with. </p><p> </p><p>Sometimes it's like reading someone elses diary or you get a laugh out of your own self and what you wrote when you were emotional. </p><p> </p><p>I do this when I'm writing a professional type letter - and I'm angry. A day later I cross off anything that says I feel, I wish, I'm sad.....any emotion - and I end up with a pretty good idea of what I wanted to say- and make a point. </p><p> </p><p>You can ALSO - FOR FREE - go to any Domestic violence shelter for counseling. It's odd how many times you talk to people who have no idea that what they are going through IS in fact, abuse. (like my abuse of punctuation here) lol. </p><p> </p><p>You don't have to be hit, or yelled at.....there's psychological abuse - mental abuse, verbal abuse....and if he's controlling - honey ? YOu need some advice from people who have been there done that and got out with no regrets. </p><p> </p><p>I would be one of those people. I'm not a survivor - I'm an over-comer. </p><p> </p><p>I really think you should give it a try - if you had your footing about your own self you'd be better able to help and guide your son. I have found this to be true in so many ways.....my son never really saw me as the MOm who had it together, when I was falling apart or crying or arguing - but once I got some therapy and started to draw boundaries with people and him? Yeah - it's like you become this person that even YOU wouldnt' want to cross. And whatever it takes to get through a divorce? Do it. </p><p> </p><p>I really hope you seek out someone local. If you have no idea who to go see.....PM me your location and I'll make some calls and find out for you. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs</p><p>MOM first - THEN kids </p><p>Air mask for adults FIRST - THEN kids......</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 270588, member: 4964"] I'm guessing youre in the accounting world......so you should be used to checks and balances. Why not make a list of checks and balances for your life....and see where it takes you. Take one issue at a time - draw a line down a piece of paper - and write good on one side and bad on the other - then think of the issue and write... Fold it up - don't read it for at least a day - then revisit the paper - and see how you feel about each issue you did this with. Sometimes it's like reading someone elses diary or you get a laugh out of your own self and what you wrote when you were emotional. I do this when I'm writing a professional type letter - and I'm angry. A day later I cross off anything that says I feel, I wish, I'm sad.....any emotion - and I end up with a pretty good idea of what I wanted to say- and make a point. You can ALSO - FOR FREE - go to any Domestic violence shelter for counseling. It's odd how many times you talk to people who have no idea that what they are going through IS in fact, abuse. (like my abuse of punctuation here) lol. You don't have to be hit, or yelled at.....there's psychological abuse - mental abuse, verbal abuse....and if he's controlling - honey ? YOu need some advice from people who have been there done that and got out with no regrets. I would be one of those people. I'm not a survivor - I'm an over-comer. I really think you should give it a try - if you had your footing about your own self you'd be better able to help and guide your son. I have found this to be true in so many ways.....my son never really saw me as the MOm who had it together, when I was falling apart or crying or arguing - but once I got some therapy and started to draw boundaries with people and him? Yeah - it's like you become this person that even YOU wouldnt' want to cross. And whatever it takes to get through a divorce? Do it. I really hope you seek out someone local. If you have no idea who to go see.....PM me your location and I'll make some calls and find out for you. Hugs MOM first - THEN kids Air mask for adults FIRST - THEN kids...... [/QUOTE]
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Anyone else here struggling with difficult child adult partner too?
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