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Anyone here have POA or custodianship of their difficult child?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 630180" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You have to be declared disabled, usually cognitively disabled or psychotic. Sonic is doing really well from where he came from and makes most of his own decisions, but he can not do money and really needs help with certain simple chores because he simply does not understand what to do. I don't believe you can get it just because your kid has a certain label, unless it includes cognitive disabilities. Lucas has always had help and will probably always need some. He was labeled disabled long ago and is active in things such as Special Olympics and is not interested in what most twenty-one year old young adults like to do. He's like one big child who can care for his needs, such as cleaning his house or getting ready for work, but he got totally confused just walking across the street asking about rental insurance, which we tried to explain to him. In the end, he asked me to please come with him because he didn't get it. He does not know how to write (he can print pretty well) and does not drive so, because he is disabled, he gets free cab rides around town that the city pays for.He is on a waiting list for a wonderful apartment complex for adults with developmental delays and he was accepted. There only needs to be an opening and he is #2 on the list. So he is bonafide disabled in the eyes of the court, although he is higher functioning.</p><p></p><p>I am his payee. I will be paying his bills because he gets too nervous about bills and if he had to pay them he would not understand how to budget or who to pay. When we are gone, they are going to appoint a court appointed payee. He has a caseworker who comes once a week to make sure he is doing ok in his apartment. He works part-time and does a remarkable job considering the odds, but he is a disabled young adult. That is different from an eighteen year old who wa not declared disabled and just is immature. You can not make any adult take psychiatric medication. I know a young woman who works with me and lives in a group home since my employee often hires disabled young adults. She has schizo-affective disorder with autistic traits. Her mother is an acquaintance of mine and told me that the group home has restrictions on what it can make her do. They can't force her to take her medications, although she will do so. She also has an eating disorder and eats constantly. Since she moved to the group home, she has gained a ton of weight. Staff can instruct her on healthy eating, but in no way are they allowed to restrict her intake of food. This is a young adult who also has a guardian, although her mother didn't want the job, so the court appointed one. There is a limit on what you can make them do even if you are a guardian. Legally, I can actually be charged with abuse if I, say, restricted Sonic from eating or did anything the state considered abusive. And every dime you spend out of the disability check...and, yes, he'd probably need to get one for him to need a guardian...plus the money he gets from his part-time job has to be documented. What did you buy? Keep the receipts, etc.</p><p></p><p>I am not sure what the rules are about what you can and can't do because Sonic is extremely compliant. I wouldn't be shocked if your son was allotted guardianship, but I'd definitely be surprised. He doesn't sound that badly disabled to me, but, then, I'm not a lawyer. For us it was a snap. We had all the testing and Sonic's long history of needing more help in cognitive areas than other people do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 630180, member: 1550"] You have to be declared disabled, usually cognitively disabled or psychotic. Sonic is doing really well from where he came from and makes most of his own decisions, but he can not do money and really needs help with certain simple chores because he simply does not understand what to do. I don't believe you can get it just because your kid has a certain label, unless it includes cognitive disabilities. Lucas has always had help and will probably always need some. He was labeled disabled long ago and is active in things such as Special Olympics and is not interested in what most twenty-one year old young adults like to do. He's like one big child who can care for his needs, such as cleaning his house or getting ready for work, but he got totally confused just walking across the street asking about rental insurance, which we tried to explain to him. In the end, he asked me to please come with him because he didn't get it. He does not know how to write (he can print pretty well) and does not drive so, because he is disabled, he gets free cab rides around town that the city pays for.He is on a waiting list for a wonderful apartment complex for adults with developmental delays and he was accepted. There only needs to be an opening and he is #2 on the list. So he is bonafide disabled in the eyes of the court, although he is higher functioning. I am his payee. I will be paying his bills because he gets too nervous about bills and if he had to pay them he would not understand how to budget or who to pay. When we are gone, they are going to appoint a court appointed payee. He has a caseworker who comes once a week to make sure he is doing ok in his apartment. He works part-time and does a remarkable job considering the odds, but he is a disabled young adult. That is different from an eighteen year old who wa not declared disabled and just is immature. You can not make any adult take psychiatric medication. I know a young woman who works with me and lives in a group home since my employee often hires disabled young adults. She has schizo-affective disorder with autistic traits. Her mother is an acquaintance of mine and told me that the group home has restrictions on what it can make her do. They can't force her to take her medications, although she will do so. She also has an eating disorder and eats constantly. Since she moved to the group home, she has gained a ton of weight. Staff can instruct her on healthy eating, but in no way are they allowed to restrict her intake of food. This is a young adult who also has a guardian, although her mother didn't want the job, so the court appointed one. There is a limit on what you can make them do even if you are a guardian. Legally, I can actually be charged with abuse if I, say, restricted Sonic from eating or did anything the state considered abusive. And every dime you spend out of the disability check...and, yes, he'd probably need to get one for him to need a guardian...plus the money he gets from his part-time job has to be documented. What did you buy? Keep the receipts, etc. I am not sure what the rules are about what you can and can't do because Sonic is extremely compliant. I wouldn't be shocked if your son was allotted guardianship, but I'd definitely be surprised. He doesn't sound that badly disabled to me, but, then, I'm not a lawyer. For us it was a snap. We had all the testing and Sonic's long history of needing more help in cognitive areas than other people do. [/QUOTE]
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