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Are we completely masochistic or just selfish?long
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 58155" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>I don't think it's any more selfish than having more than 1 biological child.</p><p></p><p>While we knew Boo had something going on, we really weren't fully informed until after we had thank you. </p><p></p><p>My purpose in life is to be a mom. I adore every single one of my kids and if husband hadn't put his foot down after Diva, we would have had 1 or 2 more. But also, and this sounds incredibly practical, one of the considerations in having more kids after thank you was we didn't want thank you to bear the brunt of growing up with- only a sibling with- a severe disability *and* we didn't want the full responsibility of caring for Boo after we're dead to fall on thank you's shoulders (obviously, this was before we realized thank you was a difficult child). thank you was my first experience at "normal" mothering, at least in the early years. I totally got the "joy" part of it (Boo was a very sick infant, his twin died shortly after they were born, not a whole lot of joy in his early years - but he's a blast now :wink: ). I wanted more of that joy. Selfish? Probably. But I think that's ok.</p><p></p><p>My parents think I'm irresponsible for having had children after Boo. Oh well... there's no question that we made good choices and that our kids are going to be okay. They're happy, healthy, and well-loved. They have a wide variety already of life experiences that I think will only serve them well. Who are my parents, or anyone else, to judge? </p><p></p><p>You know better than most that there are no guarantees of a healthy well-adjusted easy child regardless of how the easy child arrives in your home (bio or adopted). *None* of us are guaranteed that. But you also do know that you and husband want to raise another child. If you're able to adopt again, there's absolutely no reason in my humble opinion why you shouldn't. </p><p></p><p>I should add that husband and I have actually had some serious conversations about fostering once Diva is off to college (if we're still able to function, LOL). My preference would be to foster children with- disabilities, emotional or physical... why let all this life experience go to waste??? :smile:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 58155, member: 8"] I don't think it's any more selfish than having more than 1 biological child. While we knew Boo had something going on, we really weren't fully informed until after we had thank you. My purpose in life is to be a mom. I adore every single one of my kids and if husband hadn't put his foot down after Diva, we would have had 1 or 2 more. But also, and this sounds incredibly practical, one of the considerations in having more kids after thank you was we didn't want thank you to bear the brunt of growing up with- only a sibling with- a severe disability *and* we didn't want the full responsibility of caring for Boo after we're dead to fall on thank you's shoulders (obviously, this was before we realized thank you was a difficult child). thank you was my first experience at "normal" mothering, at least in the early years. I totally got the "joy" part of it (Boo was a very sick infant, his twin died shortly after they were born, not a whole lot of joy in his early years - but he's a blast now [img]:wink:[/img] ). I wanted more of that joy. Selfish? Probably. But I think that's ok. My parents think I'm irresponsible for having had children after Boo. Oh well... there's no question that we made good choices and that our kids are going to be okay. They're happy, healthy, and well-loved. They have a wide variety already of life experiences that I think will only serve them well. Who are my parents, or anyone else, to judge? You know better than most that there are no guarantees of a healthy well-adjusted easy child regardless of how the easy child arrives in your home (bio or adopted). *None* of us are guaranteed that. But you also do know that you and husband want to raise another child. If you're able to adopt again, there's absolutely no reason in my humble opinion why you shouldn't. I should add that husband and I have actually had some serious conversations about fostering once Diva is off to college (if we're still able to function, LOL). My preference would be to foster children with- disabilities, emotional or physical... why let all this life experience go to waste??? [img]:smile:[/img] [/QUOTE]
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Are we completely masochistic or just selfish?long
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