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General Parenting
Are you ticklish? And what should the response be?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 396095" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Thanks, Jennie. I hope it works OK. Talk to your daughter ahead of time to help her find her own strategy, and also do the helicopter parent a bit if you need to. Sool a sibling onto your daughter (or someone) to come tell you if there is an issue. And if there is an issue, tell older cousin that just because someone is laughing, does not mean they like it or want it to continue.</p><p></p><p>I suspect older male cousin is probably having problems working out what is appropriate and what is not, and doesn't understand the mixed messages this sends. Hopefully he's an otherwise decent kid who hasn't had anyone really explain to him that you should not impose yourself by physical strength or strength of will, where it is not welcome. And it is not easy sometimes to identify where it is not welcome.</p><p></p><p>It's like the transcripts of rape cases you might read, where the guy is genuinely perplexed - "We were kissing, she was kissing me back, she seemed really into it, so when she began to push me away I thought that was just part of the game. How can it be called rape? She had been enjoying the kissing..."</p><p></p><p>Sad, really. Not every parent explains this to their teens, and not every teen is able to get it when they do.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 396095, member: 1991"] Thanks, Jennie. I hope it works OK. Talk to your daughter ahead of time to help her find her own strategy, and also do the helicopter parent a bit if you need to. Sool a sibling onto your daughter (or someone) to come tell you if there is an issue. And if there is an issue, tell older cousin that just because someone is laughing, does not mean they like it or want it to continue. I suspect older male cousin is probably having problems working out what is appropriate and what is not, and doesn't understand the mixed messages this sends. Hopefully he's an otherwise decent kid who hasn't had anyone really explain to him that you should not impose yourself by physical strength or strength of will, where it is not welcome. And it is not easy sometimes to identify where it is not welcome. It's like the transcripts of rape cases you might read, where the guy is genuinely perplexed - "We were kissing, she was kissing me back, she seemed really into it, so when she began to push me away I thought that was just part of the game. How can it be called rape? She had been enjoying the kissing..." Sad, really. Not every parent explains this to their teens, and not every teen is able to get it when they do. Marg [/QUOTE]
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Are you ticklish? And what should the response be?
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