Arrrgh! Embarrassed and angry--teacher website

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, May 25, 2011.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    So, I'm joining the crowd here ... parents and teachers and g'sfg. Mostly, g'sfg who can convince us that the sky is green.

    I have been emailing difficult child's science teacher asking about the due date for their project, which difficult child INSISTS is June 1, and I have been insisting is this week.
    difficult child is turning in graphs and charts 2 days late (of course).
    Here's the latest response.
    ******
    Terry I'm answering too many questions that are explained on my website. I know you have some difficult circumstances, but the info you're asking is put on my website not only to help students but parents as well.

    The data table and graphs were due on Monday. Did you get my handout that was stapled to everyone's Interim? It explained what was due and how it could be turned in if power point was a problem. It was copied from my website. Friday, the Discussion and Conclusion are due. Oral presentations will start on June 1st. These dates are all on the science project timeline.
     
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Sigh... LOTS of hugs, sweetheart...
     
  3. ML

    ML Guest

    Hugs.
     
  4. Rabbit

    Rabbit Member

    sending Hugs Rabbit
     
  5. I have a easy child who tried to insist that the "rough draft" of a major project was not due THIS Thursday, but rather, NEXT Thursday -- the day before the final thing is due. Simple logic dictates that you do not turn in a draft of a major project the day before it is due, but you would think I was the dullest person on Earth by not accepting easy child's arguments on the topic. You could tell she was only working on the project to shut me up, although that works for me just fine. Jeez. My husband (who has more time at home than I do) is supposed to be checking teacher websites and following up on easy child's work, but this isn't going that well. Sometimes I think they are all difficult child's.

    Three deep breaths ... the term is almost over.
     
  6. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    O Terry--

    I'm sorry. It stinks when all we're trying to do is make sure our kids are keeping up with their work...and then we end up looking like an idiot.

    Of course, you might have KNOWN about the website if your difficult child had bothered bringing home any of the paperwork or letters from the school - but he doesn't - which is why you were emailing for more information in the first place...

    But if he had been bringing everything home and doing what he was supposed to be doing, there wouldn't be a problem to double-check in the first place.

    --sigh--

    (((hugs)))
     
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Well, my response to the teacher was, "Okay, but difficult child is so convincing ..." ;)
    I know he's rolling his eyes ...
     
  8. keista

    keista New Member

    (((HUGS))) next time try, "I understand it is posted, but sometimes time lines change, and teachers are so busy that they don't always have the time to make the update so it is verbally relayed to the kids. Thank you for taking the time to confirm the dates for me."

    The beauty of internet is that you can be ranting and raving but still present yourself as calm, rational, and sweet as pie.

    Son had several major SS projects this year and he was pretty god about the times/dates for everything. The second one, though got completed in one night because the due date on the printout was "tomorrow". (Son never pays attention in class to due dates) With much stress and assistance from me, he got it all done only to find out that the date was changed to "next week" So, yay, he was done early, but we really did NOT need that stress.
     
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I doubt any of the teachers would dare to tell a parent that it was all on the website. Mostly because they are so bad at updating ANYTHING on their websites. Even the ones who are really into technology do not update in a timely manner here. And those that are not? At Christmas the school website still had a message on the home page that was written right after school was out the May before - and it explained how up to date the site was and how parents needed to depend on the websites to know what is going on!!! Boy did the superintendent get a few calls after a letter came home just after Christmas chiding parents for calling and emailing so many questions that should have answers on the websites!!! And for asking about grades - supposedly the online grade books are always up to date but reality is that you wouldn't have a clue until report cards came out because most things were not even entered as assignments until then. One teacher went from five assignments to thirty the weekend before reportcards were sent out. But parents are NOT supposed to ask about assignments or grades because it is "all" on the websites!!!

    It was not just our school - every school had this going on! So big apology letters were sent outfrom the board of ed and the principals because they were not making sure things got updated. heck, half the time the system couldn't be updated because some setting wasn't right.

    Sorry difficult child was so convincing. Now you know to not take his word at all.
     
  10. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    I hate this stuff ~ really hate this stuff. Terry, we're so buried in the day to day of GFGdom it's hard to "remember" to check a school or a teacher's website.

    I've seen, as my difficult children got older, a lack of commitment to the tweedles IEPs, an attitude of "they are too old now" by their teachers.

    I hate this stuff. Hope your difficult child can get at least part of his science project in on time.
     
  11. seriously

    seriously New Member

    I have decided to let my difficult child and easy child bear the consequences of failing t know and meet the due dates for projects/assignments. I realize this is not an appropriate choice for some difficult child's. Mine are 15 1/2, freshmen in high school. In 3 short years they will be 18 and they need that skill well developed by then. Unless they have been sick/hospitalized, etc. they have no excuse and I will not tell the teachers to make allowances for them.

    My easy child got it very, very quickly. I will not be looking over her shoulder as a general rule. I do check her grades regularly and question her about things she hasn't turned in. But I will not hover and remind and threaten, etc.

    difficult child has been slower to get on board but he has made big strides because he really does care about getting good grades. Unfortunately, my efforts to help him "get" this have actually been sabotaged by the teachers more often than not. They let him turn things in late without penalty or go out of their way to modify the assignment so it is easier when that really wasn't needed.

    Did you even know about the website? And I completely agree that you cannot always count on the info being accurate.
     
  12. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    Ugh! So sorry. Here there is no consistency on who posts to the teacher website. Some teachers update it daily, some do it once a quarter and changes aren't made, and some don't do it at all. And then the website to access this information is not at all user friendly - and I'm no internet dummy.

    I like your response. But really...when you're arguing with a difficult child about an assignment, on top of arguing over all the other difficult child stuff, shuttling to appointments, and running a household...who can remember which teachers are the ones that update their site regularly and those that don't?
     
  13. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    It truly is maddening! My difficult child 2 consistently hears things wrong or remembers them wrong. I didn't do much hand-holding this year, and his grades show it (D's and F's). I look at him and see a big, 14yo young man, but then I look at his behavior and it's like he's in 1st grade again with his inability to attend to details like deadlines, even when he has an assignment planner at his disposal. Drives me nuts.

    Not to minimize, but be thankful that teacher actually HAS a website and posts accurate and CURRENT information. So many of the teachers my difficult child's have either don't utilize their website tool that the district gives them, or they are months behind in keeping the information current.
     
  14. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    (((Hugs)))
     
  15. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I thoroughly checked that teacher's site, printed out all the assignments, then sent him another email, this time specifically telling him which assignments difficult child had not yet turned in, pointing out that he was getting an F, and asking whether he would go to summer school. I also emailed the social wkr/school counselor.
    THAT got his attention!
    He was much nicer after that.
    I emailed the math teacher and the Spanish teacher as well.
    As others pointed out, not all the calendar dates are correct, and a huge Spanish assignment that looked to be 2 days late was over a wk late. The teacher emailed and gave difficult child an extension until Tues, but I fibbed and told him it was due Friday. :) I will help him with-it, as it involves creating a dream room, which can either be a diorama or a computer model, and of course, he wants to do it on the computer.

    I am mtng with-the counselor Fri. One of the things I am going to discuss is my disappointment in how difficult child's 504 was handled. Teachers, for ex, the Spanish teacher, give the assignment once, and if difficult child is out of the room for even an instant, it's as if the assignment does not exist. Never mind that it's a month-long project. Never mind that it's online. For ex, he missed a day due to illness, came back to school and took a quiz (after the fact), which took up the time he would have had to sit in on the class where the teacher announced the big project. In difficult child's mind, he is exempt from the project.
    Aaaargh!
    They do not get it. (Neither does difficult child. They've got to get on the same page.)
    Gvc and Flutterby, our kids sound a lot alike. :)
     
  16. keista

    keista New Member

    OMG! See, and I thought I was crazy. I almost think the teachers PURPOSELY don't tell the difficult children the assignments.

    In 5th grade son was failing because he wasn't turning in work. When I finally pinned down the teacher, she told me that because he was getting pulled out for services, he was not getting his assignments and therefore not turning them in. OK. AND????????????????????????????????? You mean it was an Aspie's 5th grade responsibility to come back in to class and ask what he'd missed????????? Breathe, breathe, breathe. My BlPr is soaring just recalling it.

    WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY back yonder when I went to school, if a kid was out, the teacher made a point of summarizing what he'd missed IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS. Looking back I know this served two purposes - gave the kid that missed out the information, and reminded everyone else.

    Nice move with "changing" the due date!
     
  17. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Yeah, very much the same. He is never going to go back and ask what he missed. I'll remember to talk to the counselor about that tomorrow.

    And the changed due date ... argh! When it was changed, I was in MN helping out with-my dad. And husband never checks assignments online. Sigh.
     
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