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Parent Emeritus
Arrrgh! I want to strangle him
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 646452" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Can you learn to see it this way, Terry? The problem, the suffering, is not in the situation, it is in the "want". Can you learn, can you teach yourself how it would look and feel, if you told your son the right thing, the thing you actually want him to know <em>and let go of it?</em></p><p></p><p>Child of Mine has a thread active now about her own process with this. It is a good one for us to read, I think.</p><p></p><p>You are doing everything anyone, <em>even a mother</em>, could do and more, Terry. It is your son who is choosing to go a wrong way. </p><p></p><p>Once our children are old enough to be out and away from our supervision, there is nothing more that we can do but to tell them the right things, the right way, the best solution.</p><p></p><p>But how they respond to us?</p><p></p><p>That is their business, and there is nothing we can do about what they will choose.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry.</p><p></p><p>I know how scary and frustrating this is. Try to steer away from self-condemnation. That weakens us.</p><p></p><p>We are here, and that will help you to be strong.</p><p></p><p>So that is one good thing, then.</p><p></p><p>:O)</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 646452, member: 17461"] Can you learn to see it this way, Terry? The problem, the suffering, is not in the situation, it is in the "want". Can you learn, can you teach yourself how it would look and feel, if you told your son the right thing, the thing you actually want him to know [I]and let go of it?[/I] Child of Mine has a thread active now about her own process with this. It is a good one for us to read, I think. You are doing everything anyone, [I]even a mother[/I], could do and more, Terry. It is your son who is choosing to go a wrong way. Once our children are old enough to be out and away from our supervision, there is nothing more that we can do but to tell them the right things, the right way, the best solution. But how they respond to us? That is their business, and there is nothing we can do about what they will choose. I am sorry. I know how scary and frustrating this is. Try to steer away from self-condemnation. That weakens us. We are here, and that will help you to be strong. So that is one good thing, then. :O) Cedar [/QUOTE]
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Arrrgh! I want to strangle him
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