sigh... I will try to keep this brief, but I am ready to crack My Dad is really not wanting us living here, despite my Mom telling me otherwise, and begging me to stay (she just doesn't want to be left alone with him). When she's not here, he tells me quite bluntly, that he is not going to spend his retirement years dealing with this Cr@p (cr@p = my difficult child's). I have no idea how to move out on my own. I can only work PT. I have no child support coming in. I do have a very small nest egg (but it would not last long) I have practically every service the State has to offer, none of which help me in the childcare department. No one will watch difficult child II. No one. difficult child I is failing school and at 17 has no motivation accept to defy me and disrespect me at every turn. I am certain he'll be in jail within the next 5 years if he keeps going the rate he's going. S2BX is due out in another month and my heart and nerves are a mess about that. And all I hear when I am home from dear old dad is things like "Freeloaders have alot of nerve to be leaving their stuff lying around" "I don't want his little bratt friends playing on my property" "I do not care if he falls off the face of the earth, he's just like his father" "If you think I am going to live with this, you have another thing coming" "I don't want all these strangers in my house (BA's and therapists)" "takers make me sick, you're a taker" but I also get "you're an idiot if you put your 11 y/o son on Lithium" I have no control over either difficult child, it's frustrating enough without being harrassed about it. I clean up after them constantly. Pay for a tutor for difficult child II. I pay the utilities here and the weekly groceries and cook and clean weekly. I literally feel like running away or going to sleep for the rest of my life!