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General Parenting
At What Point is it OK to Throw in the Towel with a difficult child ?
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<blockquote data-quote="Steely" data-source="post: 471560" data-attributes="member: 3301"><p>Hmmm.....done and done with hope are 2 diifferent feelings.</p><p>I was done when matt was 17. Put him on a plane to a Utah Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that I had never visited, and told him he could never come back home.</p><p></p><p>Hope was more recently....Hope that *something* might help....hope that *I* could help....hope that *something* could change him. Truthfully I wish the loss of hope had come sooner, because the 2 years he spent in RTCs all I did is hope, argue with the staff, and once again be his advocate which derailed me even further emotionally. </p><p></p><p>I think it was about a year ago - that my whole life fell even deeper off the proverbial cliff - and I just lost all hope for really everything, including him. Not that he is even in a bad space mentally, it is just that I cannot continue to pin my hope on things in the future anymore - only for them to be continually torn down and stomped and spit on. I can only, truly take one day at a time at this point.</p><p></p><p>Hugs....i wish I knew what to tell you in terms of what to do. At your difficult child's age I was thinking seriously of getting the kid an efficiency apt and letting him figure everything out himself. I still sort of wish I had - because the Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s also did nothing to help - and it was not until Matt has been on his own that he has really started to learn things, learn from his consequences, and from life.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Steely, post: 471560, member: 3301"] Hmmm.....done and done with hope are 2 diifferent feelings. I was done when matt was 17. Put him on a plane to a Utah Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that I had never visited, and told him he could never come back home. Hope was more recently....Hope that *something* might help....hope that *I* could help....hope that *something* could change him. Truthfully I wish the loss of hope had come sooner, because the 2 years he spent in RTCs all I did is hope, argue with the staff, and once again be his advocate which derailed me even further emotionally. I think it was about a year ago - that my whole life fell even deeper off the proverbial cliff - and I just lost all hope for really everything, including him. Not that he is even in a bad space mentally, it is just that I cannot continue to pin my hope on things in the future anymore - only for them to be continually torn down and stomped and spit on. I can only, truly take one day at a time at this point. Hugs....i wish I knew what to tell you in terms of what to do. At your difficult child's age I was thinking seriously of getting the kid an efficiency apt and letting him figure everything out himself. I still sort of wish I had - because the Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s also did nothing to help - and it was not until Matt has been on his own that he has really started to learn things, learn from his consequences, and from life. [/QUOTE]
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At What Point is it OK to Throw in the Towel with a difficult child ?
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