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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 657833" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>Hope,</p><p></p><p>I understand what you are saying. My mom was not a narcissist but my dad was..and bipolar...I had NO IDEA WHO I WAS or what I wanted well into my adulthood. My favorite story about that is that I went out with some guy for several years. We moved to LA, where he was from, further unmooring me. We used to go to a deli for lunch, and I would just order what he ordered, some sort of turkey sandwich. After we broke up, I went to a deli and ordered a turkey sandwich, and from somewhere deep in my brain I realized...I don't like turkey sandwiches. At all. And then I thought...well...what do I like? And I had no idea. None. I stood in the deli and cried.</p><p></p><p>Years of work. Years. I stumbled across one really good therapist who helped. My SO helped. Self help books helped. Seeing it helped. And I'm better now, but one of my sons is JUST LIKE I WAS. He has no idea who he is, what he wants. He just doesn't want to cause anyone any trouble. </p><p></p><p>All of this is to say...yes....I get it.</p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 657833, member: 17269"] Hope, I understand what you are saying. My mom was not a narcissist but my dad was..and bipolar...I had NO IDEA WHO I WAS or what I wanted well into my adulthood. My favorite story about that is that I went out with some guy for several years. We moved to LA, where he was from, further unmooring me. We used to go to a deli for lunch, and I would just order what he ordered, some sort of turkey sandwich. After we broke up, I went to a deli and ordered a turkey sandwich, and from somewhere deep in my brain I realized...I don't like turkey sandwiches. At all. And then I thought...well...what do I like? And I had no idea. None. I stood in the deli and cried. Years of work. Years. I stumbled across one really good therapist who helped. My SO helped. Self help books helped. Seeing it helped. And I'm better now, but one of my sons is JUST LIKE I WAS. He has no idea who he is, what he wants. He just doesn't want to cause anyone any trouble. All of this is to say...yes....I get it. Echo [/QUOTE]
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