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babysitter went m.i.a.
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 246411" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Don't be too hasty - what's written online can't be taken back if you change your mind. Make sure of the full story first. There could be many reasons why she hasn't answered the phone or returned your call.</p><p></p><p>I'm not saying she hasn't bailed on you - it's quite possible that she has. But it's also possible that something has happened. Cosider a possible alternative scenario - she's come down with meningococcal, for example, and is in hospital. Or she was in an accident. Or she's had to drop everything and go quite suddenly.</p><p></p><p>I had a good friend at school, we used to play together a lot. Her mother was a good dressmaker; even though we did most of our own sewing, my mother would at times hire my friend's mother to make a large order for us. I remember their tiny little house, I was there often, not just for fittings.</p><p></p><p>One day they were gone. My friend didn't turn up for school. The house had everything in it but there was no sign of mother and daughter, no forwarding address. Despite swearing undying friendship, they hadn't even bothered to tell us where they were moving to, and I never got a letter or anything.</p><p></p><p>But by the time I could have got upset at lack of letter, my mother had been told the story - my friend's father was supposed to be permanently in a locked psychiatric ward for te criminally insane. He had escaped, the local cop had been notified and he immediately went round to their house to collect the mother and her kids. No time to pack, just get out fast. Do not leave any details of where you will be - he is a clever man, he will try to find you.</p><p></p><p>The cop got them away within half an hour of receiving the phone call. He drove them to the train station then came by the house on the way back to the police station. The house showed signs of being broken into, some personal items and photos had been taken but nothing else.</p><p></p><p>All of this was unthinkable. If I'd been writing this as fiction, it would have seemed too far-fetched. But it happened.</p><p></p><p>I never heard from my friend again. I could have been offended, would have been, if I hadn't been told why she had to cut off all contact.</p><p></p><p>OK, your babysitter may have just given up. She sounds like she wasn't up to the job anyway. Seriously, I would say to her next time, "Oh, I've been so worried when I couldn't get hold of you, I was worried you were lying in a hospital bed somewhere, nobody knowing where you were." Or similar. If she HAS been lying in a hospital bed, then you haven't done anything you would regret. And if she hasn't been, then hopefully you will make her feel really guilty, because you don't do that to people. If she feels she can't cope with difficult child, then she should say so. I've had sitters tell me that they didn't feel up to looking after difficult child 3. One woman actually quit child-minding completely, because trying to mind difficult child 3 had convinced her she was getting too old for this lark.</p><p></p><p>If/when you find that she has just abandoned you with no rsponse, no referral on, no telling you honestly - then I would say go ahead, dump her in it. Word of mouth is generally the best way to share that information, anyway.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 246411, member: 1991"] Don't be too hasty - what's written online can't be taken back if you change your mind. Make sure of the full story first. There could be many reasons why she hasn't answered the phone or returned your call. I'm not saying she hasn't bailed on you - it's quite possible that she has. But it's also possible that something has happened. Cosider a possible alternative scenario - she's come down with meningococcal, for example, and is in hospital. Or she was in an accident. Or she's had to drop everything and go quite suddenly. I had a good friend at school, we used to play together a lot. Her mother was a good dressmaker; even though we did most of our own sewing, my mother would at times hire my friend's mother to make a large order for us. I remember their tiny little house, I was there often, not just for fittings. One day they were gone. My friend didn't turn up for school. The house had everything in it but there was no sign of mother and daughter, no forwarding address. Despite swearing undying friendship, they hadn't even bothered to tell us where they were moving to, and I never got a letter or anything. But by the time I could have got upset at lack of letter, my mother had been told the story - my friend's father was supposed to be permanently in a locked psychiatric ward for te criminally insane. He had escaped, the local cop had been notified and he immediately went round to their house to collect the mother and her kids. No time to pack, just get out fast. Do not leave any details of where you will be - he is a clever man, he will try to find you. The cop got them away within half an hour of receiving the phone call. He drove them to the train station then came by the house on the way back to the police station. The house showed signs of being broken into, some personal items and photos had been taken but nothing else. All of this was unthinkable. If I'd been writing this as fiction, it would have seemed too far-fetched. But it happened. I never heard from my friend again. I could have been offended, would have been, if I hadn't been told why she had to cut off all contact. OK, your babysitter may have just given up. She sounds like she wasn't up to the job anyway. Seriously, I would say to her next time, "Oh, I've been so worried when I couldn't get hold of you, I was worried you were lying in a hospital bed somewhere, nobody knowing where you were." Or similar. If she HAS been lying in a hospital bed, then you haven't done anything you would regret. And if she hasn't been, then hopefully you will make her feel really guilty, because you don't do that to people. If she feels she can't cope with difficult child, then she should say so. I've had sitters tell me that they didn't feel up to looking after difficult child 3. One woman actually quit child-minding completely, because trying to mind difficult child 3 had convinced her she was getting too old for this lark. If/when you find that she has just abandoned you with no rsponse, no referral on, no telling you honestly - then I would say go ahead, dump her in it. Word of mouth is generally the best way to share that information, anyway. Marg [/QUOTE]
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