This has been an extremely difficult week. I just got home last night and I'm trying to pull myself together. My mom is still hanging on and I don't know how. When we got there to see her on Monday night I didn't even recognize her. She looks so old and she isn't eating at all and just takes a few sips of liquid here and there. She looks so old and has lost so much weight. Between the cancer and the medications she is very confused and doesn't make too much sense when she speaks. They didn't think she was going to make it through the first few days we were there, but she did. I was able to let her know it's o.k. to let go and stop suffering and that we would take care of my dad. Yesterday I had to say goodbye She seemed to undertand we were leaving and we hugged and kissed and told each other we love each other. I told her I wasn't go to say goodbye because I will see her again someday in a better place. It was about the only moment she seemed to really know what was going on. She is in a lot of pain and it was so hard to see her this way. I can't get the vision out of my head. It's almost hard to believe the women I visited all week was my mother. It didn't help that they dropped her bottom teeth by accident and broke them, then she didn't want her top ones in anymore, so it made her look even older. I can only pray that she doesn't suffer much longer. It is also so difficult to watch my father see her this way. I felt so bad leaving him yesterday and I feel bad that I can't go visit my mom anymore. I have read a few of the posts, but don't have the energy to reply right now. Just wanted you all to know I'm home and I'll be checking in when I can. Thanks as always for being here for me.