Be prepared

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Nancy, Oct 16, 2012.

  1. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    PG's post today got me thinking about being prepared and knowing what options we have when our difficult children either finally decide they want help or someone decides for them. Two years ago I was in the same place PG is today. difficult child had hit bottom and was ready to go to rehab. The problem is I had no idea what was available and what we could afford. She was as ready as she would ever be. She had come home at 4 am and urinated on our carpet thinking she was in the bathroom. She was delirious and had no idea where she was.

    I spent hours that Sunday morning calling our insurance company, hospitals, rehab centers and detox units trying to find someplace we could take her. I was desperate. We ended up taking her to a substance abuse hospital to have her evaluated. Over the next week we went from outpatient treatment to inpatient at another treatment center to sober house. We maxed out our insurance, paid out of pocket what we could, and negotiated the balance. The sober house was by far the most reasonable at only $400 a month but in our case I believe she needed the inpatient stay first to detox and to educated her that she was an alcoholic and start the process of recovery.

    If I had it to do all over again I would have researched all my options before we had the crisis that brought us to that point. I now have a complete list of treatment centers and sober houses in our area, what they cost and which ones will take you in a crisis. We also took the steps of taking her off our insurance so she would be eligible for any assistance programs. I'm not suggesting that anyone follow what we did, just that you think it through so that when this day comes you have a Plan A, B, and C. Since I have been involved in my support groups I have built up a good source of reference for the next time.

    Getting help for our addicts should not be so difficult but it is. I remember sobbing into the phone that day when place after place turned me down either because she was not addicted to the "hard stuff" or we couldn't afford it or there was no bed. Do whatever you can to have your resources ready.

  2. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member brought back vivid and sad memories. You are absolutely right and I have never thought to share that very important message. Today you may have been of deep value to some of the newer S.A. posters. Hugs DDD
  3. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    This is wonderful information Nancy, thank you from all the future SA parents who will heed your advice, as DDD says, you have been of deep value to some of the newer posters.
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Nancy that doesnt just go for rehabs, it is something parents need to look into if they even have a glimmer that they may need some sort of Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement for their kids. That is something that is getting harder and harder to find. So many states are shutting them down.
  5. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    True Janet. You're free to post that on any of the forums. It's just that with substance abuse the immediate need is often acute.

    I responded from the waiting room of a doctors office from my cell phone and wasn't able to say what I really meant. When you are dealing with an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) you usually have some advance notice but when your addict says they want to go to rehab it needs to be done immediately, that day. When I read PG's post I knew exactly what she was going through sitting in front of a substance abuse counselor and being told the treatment they offer will cost thousands and not knowing where to turn, but certain that she needed to act now. I remember that completely helpless feeling. I knew of only two substance abuse medical centers and two detox units that day. Today I have a list of 78 treatment centers and sober houses and have personal knowledge of at least 20 other sober houses not on that list. There are many different options. Now that PG's difficult child is in a treatment center she will come in contact with others who have been elsewhere and she will build up a list of resources if needed. It's amazing what resources you find when you are in the substance abuse support family.

    I made a couple of big mistakes in the beginning that cost us a lot of money. The first places we had difficult child in were expensive and did very little to help, except to use up whatever medical coverage we did have. If I had done a little research ahead of time I may have made wiser decisions. I am amazed at the treatment options that are available in our city. Of course not all of them are good but there are many more than I ever knew existed. When I asked the assessment counselor where I could turn she had no advice.

    PG my advice for you is to throw yourself into any support group or parent program the center your difficult child is in offers. She is required to go to daily meetings and some of those meetings may be open support meetings. That's how I found one of the ones I go to and I now have someplace to turn if and when my difficult child ever wants help again. If nothing else I have a group of people that care about me and would come in an instant if I needed them. Who knows, you may even start a family support group of your own,

    Last edited: Oct 17, 2012