Been a long time - 504, iep, new diagnoses

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by momof4insc, Apr 12, 2008.

  1. momof4insc

    momof4insc New Member

    Hey everyone! It's been like a year since I've been here and a lot has happened since then. My son Heyward has been diagnosed at age 8 to be Bi-Polar, ADHD, ODD, with anxiety and panic attacks. Every medicine he is on, he has a violent reaction to so, it's fun as we are now on no medications. The school he is in has been fighting me tooth and nail to get an IEP. I requested one LAST April and I was told the he didnt need one. So we started the school year on a bad note. As his behavior got worse, the school noted that Heyward was a "problem". So, through MUSC (his therapist), we removed him from school and put him in a program run by the hospital. Well, that was AWFUL! They put him on Depakote and he had another reaction. He had sores all in his mouth and he couldnt talk or eat. He lost 4 pounds. I removed him from the program and put him back in his main school. Well, Heyward still had the sores and would get panic attacks, but then he started wetting himself at school. So, instead of talking to me, the school called DSS saying I was medically neglecting my son and that they think he was being abused cause he would wet himself! GRRRRR!! So, in January, my sons therapist and I DEMANDED an IEP. We had the meeting yesterday. My son finally has an IEP, but the school doesnt want to deal with him, so he is going to a self contained class in a different school. The school pysch and the principle are such liars. My sons teacher was in tears cause she adores Heyward. So, thats my year in a nut shell. Where do I go from here?
  2. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    Glad to see you back, but really sorry you guys have had such a rough year! Your therapist sounds like a real jewel!! Thank goodness she's on your team.

    What next? I guess it depends on how you feel about the self-contained classroom. Have you seen it yet? When will he start? How do you feel about the IEP and services it calls for?

    Good to see you again!
  3. momof4insc

    momof4insc New Member

    I have been invited to see the room. He will start the 21st which doesnt give me a lot of time. Heyward doesnt like change and i am afraid that he will have major meltdowns. Why cant this be easy? I don't even know the services. All I could glean is self contain classroom. That is it.
  4. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm sorry things are so rough. It sounds like the school district is an awful one. Is there a way for him to transition slowly to make it easier?
  5. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Hi! Sometimes self contained can be a blessing! Smaller classes, trained teachers and a program that isn't "gunning" for a child with issues.

    Try and pose it as a positive change. Explain to him that these people are there to help and make sure that you let him know that he's to ask you any questions that he may have. Try going once to look at the school alone and then make a quick appointment for him to "walk through" with the Principal, AP, or school psychiatric so that they can ease the transition. He'll feel better if it seems that they're all for him rather than the old school that was not feeling all that confident about "their" abilities to help him.

    Let us know how it goes and welcome back!!!

  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am sorry it is so hard. It certainly sounds like the school is horrible. I am glad that his teacher likes him a lot.

    Go and see the new classroom. Over the next week visit, schedule a time for him to visit (afterschool at first would be a good thing. He could meet the teacher, see the room, have a special outing with mom, and start to prepare.), and make sure he is at least starting to be ready for htis.

    My son was in a self-contained classroom for grade 5. A regular classroom was available, but he thought the teacher was an idiot (she was - couldn't even figure out how her cat got pregnant!). The kids in the regular class were very accepting, even jealous. The ED teacher was super, the aides were amazing, and he learned SOOOO MUCH.

    It was a good year for it, because we had homeschooled the 2 years before (3rd and 4th grades). Hoimeschooling started because the teachers at his school were abusive and cruel. No other way to explain taking a child's recess because the child did not proofread the teacher's letter to parents (this happened quite a number of times - and when he told me about it they took more recess away!!), or many of the other things they did.

    If the new class is awful, then the ladies in the Special Education forum will have some ideas to help. They are great, and they really know the ins and outs of Special Education law. Homeschooling can be a great option - several of us here have done it or are doing it. I am homeschooling my 7th grader. It isn't easy, but it has been a pretty good experience.

    Hugs, I know this stinks,

  7. looking4hope

    looking4hope New Member

    The only thing I can add is to make sure that there's a Behavior Support Plan (BSP) as part of the IEP. Also, check out the BPKids site about what they recommend for educational services for bipolar children. They have some great suggestions.

    My son, after two years of hell at public schools, finally ended up in a nonpublic school that has the mental health and behavioral support he needs to be successful in school. He's very bright, so academics have never been the issue. But we all know the behavioral issues our difficult children bring to the classroom! I went to dozens of IEP meetings to get him where he is, and the school district is paying the tab. Be aware that this may be something that you'll have to decide later, but the Special Education law (IDEA) states that kids should be in the "least restrictive environment". I had to keep restricting the environment to get my difficult child the support he needed.

    Do check out the school, and have your son visit, too. It will help tremendously for him to step into an environment that isn't completely new. If you can, try and stay for the first hour of his first day. Most teachers won't object, and it will put him at ease.

    Good luck and let us know how he does!